f r i e n d s || mark lee

t w e n t y n i n e

I finally woke up in the morning to a pillow dampened from tears and a headache that pulsated through my head intensely.

I looked over to my phone to see that I fell asleep on the phone with Jaemin. I immediately hung up, feeling like that was a mistake. But I did text him letting him know that I'm appreciative of him being there for me while my world was crumbling all around me at once.

Me:
Thank you nana, for everything

I went back onto Twitter to see if Dispatch was still trending, but instead "MiMark" was trending instead.

Ew, I whispered to myself, that's not even a cute ship name.

I tossed my phone down on my bed and sighed.
Why me? Why us?

My dad came into my room without knocking, already irritating me before even opening his mouth.

"Hey are you okay? We didn't mean to wake you up last night"

"I'm use to it" I said monotonously

"That doesn't make it okay, we're both sorry"

"Thanks dad-"

"Is everything alright, were you crying?!?"

"I don't want to talk about it right now-"

My dad began to gaze all over my room, eyeing my damp pillow and then my medication sitting on top of my night stand,

"What happened? Are you taking your medication again? Melanie answer me!"

"Yes I used it last night but that's it-"

"I knew it! Going to school in New York is going to make you all sick again! I'm going to talk to your mother about you transferring!"

"What?!? First of all suffering from anxiety doesn't make me 'sIcK'. Secondly going to school in New York is the best thing to ever happen to me! I haven't suffered from an anxiety attack like last night in almost 2 years! Instead of self diagnosing me as sick maybe you should actually realize when your daughter is going through hell and stop waking her up at 3am with screaming and yelling!"

I began to recall my last anxiety attack. It was my first night in New York after finally moving into my dorm and reality setting in that I was a freshman in college, in a whole new country. I lost myself in frantic silence and cried endlessly, I took a walk around the city when I bumped into a stranger. He had dark brown hair, contrasted by his bright smile,

"I'm sorry I didn't mean to hit you!"

"It's fine," I said dismissively as my mind focused on my overwhelming feelings

"No it's not, I'm Jaemin. And I want you to push me back"

"What?"

"Push me!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

I snapped out of the flashback as my dad proceeded to roll his eyes and slam my door as he exited from my bedroom. Momentarily I heard my parents arguing,