out of reach//TMI

Chapter Eighteen: Tears

Songs:

Amnesia-5SOS

Habits-Tove Lo

Mess Is Mine-Vance Joy

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Clary's POV

The next morning, I could barely get out of bed. I'd cried myself to sleep, because I realized that I'd done exactly what Jace did to me last year. I was the cheater now, and I was disgusted with myself.

I descended the stairs down to the kitchen, and I saw Izzy, Simon, and Alec sitting in some of the seats pushed into the table. They all had concerned looks on their faces. Great, I thought. 

"I assume you know what happened?" I said warily. They all nodded slowly, and I sighed. 

I walked to the counter and grabbed a piece of toast, then started walking up the steps again. I turned around as Simon said quietly, "Why did you do it?" 

I let out a frustrated noise and I said, "Justin and I were talking, and I tried to leave, but he pulled me back and kissed me. He kissed me. I was about to pull away and smack him or something, but Jace walked in, and well, you know how it went from there."

The looks on all of their faces changed completely, and Alec said, "Oh." I was pleased that they understood, but still disgusted with myself.

"It's still not an excuse, though. Even though Justin kissed me, well, he still kissed me. I was with Jace, and we kissed each other. I'm disgusted with myself." I let out my thoughts, and looked down at the floor with guilt.

Isabelle stood up and pulled me in for a hug. "It's not your fault at all. He kissed you, and Jace misunderstood it." she said, comforting me.

"Yeah, we believe you." said Alec with an encouraging smile.

"Thanks. But no offense, it's not helping Jace's outlook on things.." I trailed off. The three of them stared at me with sympathetic faces.

"We all tried going into his room to talk to him, but the door's been locked. Just give him a bit more time." said Simon. I grumble an "okay" then returned up the stairs. 

I felt a powerful bump on my shoulder, and turned to see that it was Lindsay. She stopped and said, "Oops! Sorry." in a fake voice, and I narrowed my eyes at her. 

"Watch where you're going." I said, poison dripping from my voice. She pretended she didn't hear me and kept walking down the stairs. 

"Bitch." I said under my breath as I returned to my room.

Jace's POV

I missed Clary a lot already, and I even heard her crying through the walls last night. I can't give in to her though, she'd hurt me too badly for me to do that. All I kept thinking, despite her pleading explanation last night, was how could she? 

Isabelle, Alec, and Simon had all tried coming in to talk to me, but I didn't answer. I knew that they would all just try to convince me to talk to Clary, and that would make me weak. I could resist her for another week or so, because she resisted me for a year.

I sighed as a knock sounded on my door. It's probably Izzy or Alec, I thought. "I'm busy!" I yelled from inside my room.

A quiet, soothing voice said, "Jace? It's me, Lindsay. Can we talk." Lindsay? Well, this could get interesting.

"Okay." I said, getting up to unlock the door. Lindsay came in, wearing a short red top that showed a strip of bare stomach, tight black jeans, high heeled black boots, and a hell of a lot of mascara. She shut the door behind her, and sat down beside me on my bed.