It's the Little Things in Life

Chapter 5

~Meghan

Grant had to go to work and left me with Cheryl. I didn't know how to feel about her; she seemed nice but I don't know she didn't talk much and seemed to have a sour side. She scared me sometimes and in a way reminded me of Meghan.

After cleaning up from breakfast, she joined me in my room and sat on my bed as I played with some toys they had in my room.

"Americus, do you know what it means to pray?"

I looked at her for a second then shook my head. I hadn't a clue what she was talking about.

"Do you know how Grant and I held your hands, closed our eyes, and bowed our heads before we ate?"

I nodded, "And Grant said a speech that started with "Dear Father"."

She laughed, "Yes, he did start that way, but it's not a speech, he is praying."

"What does 'praying' mean?"

"It means to like talk to God and tell him how you're feeling."

"Who's God?" I continued to play while listening to her.

"God is the maker of the heavens and Earth. He created you, me, Grant, and everyone else on this Earth. He even created the animals. God is good."

"God made Benji?"

"Whoever Benji is he made him, yes."

I smiled and then thought about what she had said, "but if he is good why does he make bad?"

"God doesn't make bad, Satan does."

The way she said Satan scared me, "Who's Satan?" I stuttered.

"Satan is the one the made the bad. He wants to keep us from God."

"Satan made Ally."

"Who is Ally, Americus?"

I continued to play like I hadn't heard her. I didn't want to talk about Ally or her parents or anything that had to do with her.

"What is Heaven?" I wondered aloud.

"Heaven is where we go after we die, but in order to get there we have to accept Jesus into our hearts."

"Who is Jesus?"

"He is God's perfect son. He came to Earth and was killed on a cross," I must've looked scared because she went on to say, "he did it willingly to pay for our sins."

"What are sins? And how does he fit in our hearts?"

She laughed, "He doesn't physically come into our hearts, but spiritually. Our sins are what Satan bribes us into doing things that displeases God."

"Why do we let him have our hearts? What if we want to keep it?"

I don't know what she found funny this time, but she laughed and had to compose herself before continuing, "No, Americus, we don't physically hand him our hearts. We ask him to forgive us of our sins and from there he will forgive us, no matter how great the sin, as long as we follow his path for us and listen to him the rest of our lives."

"What is his path?"

"His path is different for everyone. The path he has for you is different than the path he has for me."

"Do we have to go to church to have God in our hearts?"

"Just because someone goes to church doesn't mean they have God, but it is good to go to church when you do have God."

I continued to play with my toys. I could tell Cheryl had laid down on my bed. A few minutes later I could hear her breathing slow into sleep.

I got up and decided to tour the house. I walked into the living room and saw pictures of Cheryl and Grant and another girl I didn't know. As I looked around I noticed that this girl was everywhere. I wondered who she was. She was beautiful. I wanted to look like her.

I heard a noise behind me and saw Cheryl standing there, her eyes bugged out at the picture of the girl I picked up.

"Who is this pretty girl?" I asked Cheryl, snapping her out of her trance.

"That's uh... our daughter," she stuttered then continued, "she was pretty wasn't she?"

She softened and walked over to me and gently took the picture and looked it over.

"Where is she?"

"She isn't here anymore."

"Where did she go?"

Tears filled Cheryl's eyes, "She went to be with God."

"In Heaven?"

She laughed, "Yes, in Heaven."

"What was she like?"

"She was funny, nice, she had lots and lots of friends, and she was always really good to Grant and me."

"What happened to her?"

She choked up before going on, "She got hit by a drunk driver and didn't make it." Tears streamed down her face. I walked over to her and gave her a hug.

I was about to ask what a 'drunk driver' was, but then Grant walked through the door and called, "Where's my Americus?"

I ran over to him and gave him a hug, too.

After that, he glanced at Cheryl and noticed she was crying, "What's wrong Sweetheart?"

"Can we talk in the kitchen?"

"Yeah, sure," he handed me his jacket and briefcase and asked, "could you set those down on the couch over there?"

I smiled and lugged his stuff to the couch and set it down. I took one last glance before making my way to the kitchen.

"Grant, she reminds me so much of Melissa," Cheryl was saying, "you should have seen how she acted when I talked to her about God. It was like when we first did that with Melissa. And then I fell asleep on her bed and she went down to the living area and was looking at the pictures," she paused to blow her nose, "she asked about Melissa and I realized how much they were alike, that I just broke down."

"Oh, Cher," Grant moved to hug her, "it's ok. God told us that Americus needed home and we can give it to her."

"How? When she's just here reminding us of her?"

He pulled her back to look at her, "You're not suggesting on giving her up again are you?"

"Grant, I can't deal with this. It's too much for me. You decide what you want to do with her, but it's too emotional for me."

"We could let her grow up and be like Melissa. Is that so bad?"

"No one can replace Melissa!"

"I'm not saying we replace her. I'm saying we let her grow up the proper way, not through the broken foster care program."

I realized who they were talking about. They want to get rid of me. Melissa is their daughter and I am too much like her. I'm leaving again.

Tears poured down my face as I turned and ran up the stairs.

My heart was slowly breaking and it was getting harder to repair.