I guess I don't realy know what to write now. I got on here, planning to write something, and I guess it all just escaped me.
I told Trevor what Anna said about me being an evil brat, and I said "Knowing her, brat wasn't the word she was thinking of." He just nodded, and after a minute, I continued sadly by saying "The part that sucks, is that you know she's right."
And she shook his head, almost laughing.
I saw her on a few days ago and just expected her to have forgotten all about our fight, and talk to me like nothing had happened. a part of me wanted that, just so I could yell at her.
Oh, and Lea, who seems to be my only real friend most of the time, told Trevor that I had feelings for him, again. now, I can't just brush it off as Anna being Anna. he would have believed that she'd made it all up. but now, there's no denying it's already confirmed itself in his head.
I dragged Lea away and yelled at her a minute, but she just yelled "You have to tell him! You're perfect for each other!"
Wishing I could explain my way of thinking, how I decided to stay friends with him for as long as I can, without ever dating him, or telling him I like him, or anything. Lea just didn't know how wrong she was when she had said that.
"And did it ever occur to you that maybe I didn't want to be perfect for him." she wouldn't have understood any further than that.
Also, that death grip I had on her arm while dragging her outside opened a cut on said arm. Not pretty.
Is it bad, though, for me to like him, but decide I can't ever let anything happen there? And it's not just because I don't want to risk our friendship, it's something else entirely. I just don't know if it would really be smart.
YOU ARE READING
Dear Diary (May's Diary)
Non-FictionA/N: This is my real diary entry, only with different names than reality. I'll try to update these every few days, even though it's not for you guys. It's more for my personal mental health. I swear, if I don't write them down, I might go insane...
