F.A.F // H2OVanoss [Completed]

Chapter 40

Been posting a lot on my Instagram lately, hoping to start posting the aesthetic board for Killer From Purgatory really soon!!! (It's pretty big and when I showed it to my friends they loved it so I think I'm doing something right)

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Tyler had waited outside Evan's English classroom, cornering him and forcing him to come to the cafeteria with him. Evan was too scared to say no, knowing that no matter how friend Tyler's blue eyes looked they would always hold violent intentions in Evan's head.

"Thank god that essay is over, right?" Tyler looks over his shoulder and frowns at the sight of how shy Evan looks. "Dude, lighten up, we have a party tomorrow."

"I still don't want to go, Tyler." Evan's quiet voice had barely reached Tyler's ears before he was pulled down a deserted hallway and into an empty classroom. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry!" Evan exclaimed, putting his arm up to cover his face in fear of Tyler hitting him.

"Dude, chill. I'm not gonna hit you. Are, are you okay?" Tyler said, smiling as Evan moved his arm, still shaking as Tyler gripped his other arm. He nodded in response to Tyler's question as he waited to know what the hell was going on. "Oh, I wanted to talk to you before everyone got here-we're meeting here today by the way, because everyone kept talking about you and Jon- I mean, that asshole, so we're sitting in here." He looks towards the door. "Anyway, I don't know what's going on between you and Craig, but fix it, okay?" Tyler gets closer to him. "I don't like it when my friends are mad at each other." Evan pulls his arm from his grip.

"He wouldn't be mad at me if it weren't for you." His voice is harsh and anger controls him for a few seconds. "This is all your fault."

"Okay, calm down, Evan, I think you're overreacting here-" Tyler is cut off as Evan's fist collides with his jaw.

"Fuck you, you're ruining my life and you know it, Craig hates me because of you. Because he likes you and now he thinks that I like you too, but I don't, okay? You're an asshole. I hate you." Evan says, taking a seat in one of the chairs and putting his head down as Tyler recovers from the punch. He's about to retaliate when the door opens and their friends walk in.

"Oh, hey guys!" Tyler greets while Evan stays in his position, trying not to cry out of frustration and anger. He was at least thankful he was no longer alone with Tyler.

"Hey Ty! Evan, are you okay?" Brock said, immediately drawn to Evan and how miserable he looked even though he couldn't see his face. He turns to Tyler. "Is he okay?"

"Evan's not feeling too good, he has a headache." Tyler says, looking at Evan with sympathy. Evan wants to punch him again, but he couldn't let everyone know. He just had a headache, a fake headache. "But, he's really excited for the party!"

"Yeah, me too!" David said as he entered the room last. "The party is going to be great!"

"Hopefully no one gets drugged this time." Craig says, looking directly at Evan only to be smacked lightly on the arm.

"Not cool, dude." Brock said. "So, how was everyone's day? Tyler, did you actually try on your essay?" Brock runs a hand through his hair as they all sit on top of desks and begin to talk, letting Evan be alone like he wanted to be.

"Of course I did, guilt is such an easy emotion, it's like love, enough people write about it you don't even need to experience it to know what it feels like." Evan's arm still itched, and he ignored the urge to scratch it. He couldn't, not with his friends around, they would ask questions he didn't want to answer, questions he couldn't answer. They'd ask him what's wrong, but he couldn't tell them out of fear that they wouldn't believe him. They'd never believe him, because he was fine, always fucking fine.

The itching was unbearable, getting so bad that he began to scratch at his other arm just to give himself some kind of relief. It wasn't working, being in a room with his friends wasn't helping him at the moment. He needed to leave, get up and find somewhere where he could be alone, but leaving his friends meant giving an explanation he didn't have that hid the truth.

Evan knew he needed help, but he couldn't get it, he was fine, he couldn't have a problem. Everyone knew he was just down about the breakup, nothing else, he couldn't have anything else. Fuckboys are fine.

Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine.Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fine. Fin-

Evan's collapsed onto the floor before he even knows what's going on, his breathing is all kinds of fucked up and he can't figure out if he's seeing his friends or angels at the gates of Heaven.

"Evan? Evan, what's wrong? Come on, dude, talk to us." Tyler said, about to crouch down when Brock stops him.

"Dude, don't you see? He's having a panic attack, does anyone have any breathing techniques?" Brock says. Craig is focused on Evan and how miserable he looks and he feels guilty about the things he had said about his friend's anxiety a little while ago.

"I don't know, counting?" Brian suggests, and collectively they all begin to count and hope that it was enough to help Evan, not sure of what he was going through.

He's sinking, Evan feels like he's underwater and he's sinking like the titanic. Nothing is making sense and he can faintly make out his friend's voices as they count down. Evan misses home, he misses his razor and the blood that drips from his arm every time this has been happening lately. Breath escapes him and he's now gasping, unaware of how much he's worrying his friends, who are desperately trying to help him.

Evan misses Jonathan.

Then it all goes away, and his breathing comes back slowly and his friends are pulling him up and into a hug once he feels like himself again. His thoughts always lead him back to Jonathan.

"Holy shit, Evan, are you okay? That looked so scary." Brian said, getting a nod from Evan as he's crushed in a hug.

"Happens all the time, I'm fine. Don't worry." Evan doesn't meet his friends' eyes, not having the heart to lie to them so passionately after he had really scared them. "I just felt really stressed out, but I'm fine."

"What's that feel like?" Craig's quiet voice speaks up and he's looking at Evan like he's a ghost.

This time, Evan answers honestly.

"Dying."