SEVEN I S2G if U read this shit I will find U & murder U it's unedited.

PART 2

            My alarm clock starts ringing. It’s on my nerves. The voice is totally normal but I hear it like screams. A stream of low screams like it’s trying to warn me of something. Or just a song to wake me up. I can’t open my eyes. I don’t want to open them. Everything is against me. I’d rather live like a human that has no senses. trange illusions loom up. My ears don’t hear sounds just like how they really are to the other people. Foods don’t taste normal. I mean there’s nothing called taste saved in my brain. I don’t know what sour, sweet, salty or bitter means and feels. I have my really own tastes. They don’t affect my body. They have affections on my soul. Overall it means that –I’m not normal that’s why people think that I’m insane.

            In a second I feel that I don’t have to keep going on. I can keep my eyes shut forever. I don’t have to live with people who hate me. People who don’t feel that I’m a human too. Or better say the world that doesn’t accept me. I’m just a glitch in this universe. but the other part of me tells me that I’m too afraid to do that.

            The alarm clock collapsed under the weight of my fist. I groan because of the horrible pain and stand up. I stretch myself until I hear the sound of my bones and yawn. A really huge yawn.

***

            I stop breathing. Everything is turned into two. Everything except me. Like I’m stuck in two different dimensions. Two dimensions, a single world. I felt that I was floating in time. One of my lights is working as normal but one of them is not steady. It’s shaking. The light is turning on and off. I can see blood on it. I close my eyes and concentrate. That’s how I always get out of the illusions. Everything turns normal again. I mean how people think normal is. Totally the opposite from what I think about normal.

            I can’t relax in even a second. As soon as I get out of a trouble, I get into another. They aren’t going to end. Never. I don’t even know what never means. They are not clever enough to make more new troubles for me. Until I die. I don’t even know what death really is. I don’t even know if it exists. I don’t know if I’m going to have a normal peaceful life. If I do, I don’t know if I’m going to be in peace after I die. People always consider things using their own factors. Factors they make because of their own limitations and that’s not fair. Just like a baby who can’t get along with being small. The only thing they can’t do anything with is death. Or maybe they are its own creators. After Ben died, I mean after mom and dad stopped seeing him, they said that he’s gone forever. But he wasn’t. He was living with us, talking with me and doing normal stuff and he wasn’t wearing a white dress and playing that magical instrument called Chang. He didn’t have a floating crown either.  I think that it’s their problem because they can’t see him or maybe I’m not supposed to notice him.

I can see stuff people can’t see like the dark shadows. They move on the walls. Like moving stickers. I’m used to them. Different people, different emotions (If they got any) and different gestures. They are like my friends. They listen to me without jumping on my thoughts. They listen fully to the end. The point is that they don’t have any reactions. They have shinny eyes. Different colors. Red, pink, blue, yellow, orange etc. I can’t sleep without them. They are my lights when the lights are out. No one can see them except me. This is one of the pros of being abnormal. Something normal people will never experience.

 

There are more complex versions of them that can walk around. The 3D versions! Like Ben. He is in color and looks normal. He can speak and reply just like normal people. The only difference between them and normal people is that only I can see them. As I said they are totally normal. Excet that they can’t be seen with normal eyes and they don’t grow. I mean I’m not sure because I haven’t been knowing a ghost that long to know if it’s been growing or not.