ColdFlash

Pain

Barry's POV

Cisco banged on the door, his fists drilling into the wood.

Barry hasn't left his apartment in eight days...

After attempting to find his soulmate, well, after failing miserably, Barry had locked himself in his apartment.

Barry has, although, had a rather rough time lately...

*flashback*

Barry waded in the fresh crisp air, unsure whether he should enter the criminals bar again. This was the bar where those swollen eyes locked with his, soon disappearing but never the less, they had enveloped his soul.

Barry wrapped his fingers around his blue sweat shirt, he thought it was the least suspicious looking outfit he owned. His breath hitched as he entered, large bustled men glaring in his direction. Barry, unable to be hidden due to his abnormal height, took a deep breath and moved cautiously forward.

He hung at the bar, scanning for Leonard's parka. Nothing. He felt untouchable to Barry, something so far he could never reach it, another galaxy to him. Some big, unknown mysterious thing that he could never understand.

All these emotions and Barry had met him once.

...

It didn't make sense, but neither did love.

Barry sat staring at a page from the Dictionary of SoulMarks and Soulmates.

It read;

Upon meeting a soulmate, some may find this experience uncomfortable. Although the theory of SoulMates is simple, realistically it is intricate and can be at times confusing.

Love; an aching of the soul, yearning for another person or thing desired by an individual.

Some have described their meeting of their soulmate as daunting, yet others an enlightening experience. The opinion will differ from each person, although ones past will most certainly impact their conclusive thoughts on this event.

Studies have shown that individuals with generally positive and supportive pasts and current lives will respond better than those with inner turmoil and that obtain a somewhat damaged or tainted history. If one has been through massive trauma, this event is often confronting and can be shocking.

One must remember, that every person had a past before their soulmate, this fact is often forgotten.

Love is a confusing thing. Beautifully mysterious and yet also, terrifying. 

Barry's eyes must have read that page a thousand times.

Cisco's hands were still slamming on the door and soon enough he fell through the air beside his friend.

'Barry?! Are you okay?'

Barry's empty, mud eyes glanced at Cisco, his loss of hope evident in the open book before him.

Cisco, has met his soulmate. A very long time ago and this page was the perfect definition of what occurred.

He placed himself on the seat beside Barry, evading his eyes as small droplets slithered over his chin.

Cisco's pain swallowed him, slithered like poison through his veins. The memory of his past like violent attacks on his mind.

He forced the lump in his throat downward as he grabbed his friends hand in attempt to reassure both of them.

Cisco spoke softly, so quietly Barry nearly could not hear.

'I know, that everything right now is hard.

It's painful...

And a soulmate, is probably what you think will solve it.

It won't Barry.

When...Caitlin and I met...and we realised that she and I were....

She was already engaged.

Then he...died and the pain, the trauma, it was too much.

I lost my only love Barry.

I know everyone thinks it's because I'm just...geeky. But it's because if I push her, if I do anything, it'll drive her away...

And I would rather live my entire life struggling to be there, to be with her...than not have her at all.

You your soulmate...they hurt you?'

Barry looked up in confusion. How did Cisco know?

'I get it Barry.

Don't worry, no one else has figured it out.

Being alone, it hurt but, you can do it.

I'm sorry...for whatever happened.'

...

That night, Barry's thoughts had been so great, so much, that he...ran.

He felt the wind on his body and the frosted air and he fell.

He fell through the universe, through his mind, through the world.

He fell.

He hit the pavement from two stories high.

It was all too much.

He broke his back.

Hospital.

He laid unconscious...with Cisco by his side, holding his soft hands, waiting...

Waiting for his lover to return.