"I'll wait."
Those were the last words he spoke to her and he damn right meant them.
Runner fell for the wild beauty that was dragged in by the Riders from the first moment he laid her eyes on her. She was an enemy of the club and he shouldn't but...
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Magdalene
I go round the pool table into the stillness of the night and I put one ball in after the other, needing to clear my head after my meltdown today. Everyone is asleep and it's so calm and quiet. That's when I hear footsteps coming my way. Runner, I know instantly by his smell and the rhythm of his body. It's impossible not to feel him anymore.
"If I knew that this damn thing would tear you from our bed in the middle of the night, I would have never bought it," he wraps his arms around my waist from behind.
Our bed. There was a time not so long ago when dread would have filled my soul at this simple statement. But now, there's only a warm feeling. Our bed. I close my eyes and I let go in his arms. I do that more and more often for more and more time. I let go when he is around. I caress his strong, reassuring arm and my head falls on his chest.
"I just wanted to clear my head."
"You OK, angel?"
He searches my face with worry as if I am going to break down any minute again. But he doesn't need to worry. If he is near, I am calmer.
"I freaked you out, right?" I turn to face him.
"No you didn't freak me out," he shakes his head. "You scared the shit of me. You've gone so pale, so strained. I thought that I lost you."
"I... I started having these attacks ever since-"
Oh, god, that just came out so naturally. Years of therapy and as many under the care of my sister to admit as much but with him, it comes easier.
Runner nods and tightens his arm around me. He knows about me but not details and certainly not from me. I never want to talk about it, it makes it so painfully real. I barely talked to Salome about what happened in that bunker the sick man of a man has turned into a torture prison for his own daughters. But with Runner, I feel so safe, as if nothing like that will ever happen to me again as long as he is near.
I take a deep breath and I muster my courage. It might push him away. No one wants to be close to a monument of pain all the time but he has the right to get a glimpse. And more than anything, for the first time in my life, I need to talk, to take it off my chest, to stop being crippled all the time. So, I talk.
"He used to say that I couldn't breathe because the Devil was trying to possess me. That my spirit was fighting with demons and some shit like that. Like it had nothing to do with him standing naked before me, forcing me to touch him. And he said..." I struggle, "he said he would exorcise them, cleanse me, make it better. Through his love. That's the word he used for raping me, his own flesh and blood. Love."
I swallow and muster my failing senses that are abandoning me as the memories flood me again. Anger takes over Runner's look but he keeps caressing my back in slow soothing motions like he did when my lungs stopped working. He says nothing as if he senses I need to take out the shit I have in. But I can't talk more about it.
