The Arcoiris Effect

Chapter 9: Lost Identity (In which I had an existential crisis)

I couldn't help but stare. She was by far the strangest human I had ever seen. (I couldn't say creature because I was pretty sure Santino took the cake with that one) Her oily eyes flickered in the firelight and it felt like she was staring right through me. Not the most comfortable feeling.

Muir went to sit by the beast. Vale patted my shoulder and left quietly

I was left sitting in the dark, on the floor, with an unconscious beast behind me. And just like that the tears started coming.

Pathetic, I know.

But I couldn't hold them back. My mind was spinning and I felt suspended, hanging in the middle of nothingness.

I was really in a different world now.

A world where magic existed.

A world of violence and innocence.

Was all this fighting for the greater good?

Was it worth it?

If fighting led to freedom and was good, why did so many people die in the process?

What could possible be so important that it would be worth losing lives in the process?

Was it really good?

Could good and bad coexist simultaneously and in harmony?

Could someone with good intentions do bad things?

Could a bad person be doing good? Morality as a whole was brought into question. What if the idea of good in this world was different from the one I was used to? Or was it that this world was parallel to my own, one that was not so different at all.

I wondered if the people were the same as well. Were the people who would cage a creature like this right or wrong? I may have released the bonds, but was that the right choice? Did they have a reason? After all, this beast could be a killer, a murderer and I just set it free. How could I know? I knew nothing.

My viewpoint on everything in this world was completely at the mercy of those who had found me. Was the person beside me good? Were they bad? It was all subjective. I had no idea as to whom or what to believe. From any point of view, even the worst person could appear good.

As I watched the breath of the beast flicker the torchlight, I was lost. I was surrounded by strangers and no one to trust. How could you trust a person you didn't know?

Trust was such a delicate thing. It took years to build and moments to break. It was so easily manipulated by someone's lies. Any person could lie, cheat their way through trust. Even the worst people could be feign sincerity through their glass face.

Was Muir one of them? Was there cruelty hidden in those murky eyes?

Or manipulation on her lashes?

Did her lips scorn venom while murmuring sweet words?

Were her hands the harbingers of pain and suffering?

I cannot tell you what to believe. Nor who to trust. You have a chance to rebuild who you are. Everything thing you chose will shape your fate, your ideals. You are starting anew.

That was what she told me without uttering a word.

Her eyes slid over to meet mine. A definite beauty lay in her mismatching features. Her skin littered with stars and painting the beautiful map of her body.