Chapter Three: Drunk Panic

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Apparently, along with being a nervous eater, I'm a nervous drinker.

When the plane first started to shake, my balance flew out of the window along with my chances of staying alive. I didn't even realize I was sitting on Joshua's lap until I heard his voice behind my ear.

"I don't mind, but I don't think sitting on my lap is pretty safe..." He trailed off, obviously not freaking out about the turn of events at all. Blinking, I hastily plopped myself in the beige leather seat beside his. I didn't even have time to be embarrassed about my little 'lap' incident, because there was only one thing on my mind at that moment.

I was going to die.

This was it. My life would end and I would have only been kissed once by some asshole, never had the chance to get my eighty grand, and only had one unfortunate job that got me killed.

Needless to say, I was hyperventilating. If the plane going down didn't kill me, my lack of oxygen would.

I could feel myself vibrating in my seat and letting out short surprised yells every time the plane gave another jolt. I heard Joshua's whisper through one of my screams asking me to relax. I was going to tell him off, but Little Miss Gola strolled up and sat down on his lap. A place also known as my previous seat.

"Babe, I'm so scared! Hold me?" Gola pouted seductively. I was about to tell her that it wasn't safe to sit on his lap but thought better of it. Joshua obviously didn't object or talk to her about any safety measures. How could he if he was swapping spit during those moments? Luckily, at least her dress was back on.

If this thing was going down, then their own stupid decisions could get them killed.

I don't know when it happened, but at some point I started to speak. They weren't safe coherent sentences though. The stress and nerves broke my common sense and almost made me black out. Almost.

I was for sure awake, but conscious? Not so much.

"...I've always been secretly freaked out about never having a boyfriend. I mean is there something wrong with me? Do people know about my Justin Timberlake crush? Because my expectations aren't that high I swear! It's just that ever since I heard 'Rock Your Body', I fell in love you know? Oh my god! What if I die alone? Jesus, I can't breathe. Can you breathe?" I rambled all of this to Gola who had stopped kissing Joshua to look at me confusedly.

In the back of my mind I knew that the girl didn't comprehend a word I was saying. She didn't need a panic attack to be totally confused like I did.

I turned to Joshua and began to question him instead, "Did you know that I can't feel my fingers? Yeah, for reals. I can't breathe either, did you know that? Have you ever had a boyfriend?"

That last question seemed overly important to me. I think I even repeated it a couple of times, because when he first denied it I didn't want to believe it.

I had officially lost it when I asked, "But why? You're too pretty not to have a boyfriend! Don't worry you'll find your prince charming one day..." Joshua looked mildly uncomfortable at my last statement.

I wasn't the only one who noticed that I had gone off of the deep end. A tall glass was thrust into my hand by some ambiguous being, and I didn't think twice before I drowned the liquids in one big gulp.

Then I did it again.

And again, until I lost count of how many glasses had been sent into my hands.

Finally, I got drunk for the first time in my life.

I didn't know this while it was happening; all I knew was that all of a sudden all of my problems had evaporated away.

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