Sugar Babe [Completed]

Chapter Two: Lowly Lows

 

Did sparks fly?

Did I suddenly feel like my world changed irreversibly as my heart fluttered with new found love?

No.

If you were to personally ask me what a Joshua Lachowski kiss felt like, I would much rather have all of my toes cut off before admitting it happened, but if you did, I would have one comment.

Too much tongue.

Yuck, the guy practically vacuumed a girl's face off. Also, he liked to grope, and while some girls were into that, I didn't need a hand sweeping all over my body as if it were washing a car. I realized that I could offer more than one comment and that unsettled me.

At first, the shock of having my first kiss pretty much floored me. I know how cliché: a nerdy girl who's never been kissed. Please hold off on the dramatic gasps.

I came to my senses at the same moment he started to tug at my shirt.

Uh, I don't think so you greedy pervert.

I started to push at his bare shoulders with the sweaty palms of my hands. Huh? When did my palms get this sweaty?

The problem was that all of the pushing I was doing seemed to urge the kinky bastard even more.  I needed to get this loser off of me and fast. We finally reached the bathroom wall. At that moment I felt something poking really hard against my thigh. No, not that.

My chopsticks!

And that is the story about how I, Lilly Fester the Nerd, beat Joshua Lachowski off with a stick. I blinded him for life as the harsh tip of the chopstick protruded into his eye and ended his modeling career forever.

I'm kidding.

But, boy did I commit. If his six-pack were to be considered bubble wrap, I probably popped the entire thing.  Bashing his head with a couple more forceful strokes of my other stick, he finally jumped away from me with a yelp. That would teach him to make out with innocent people!

"Damn, that hurt!" Joshua exclaimed with a slight Brazilian accent that I hadn't noticed before.

Damn right it did. Huffing, I replied, "Good! Who do you think you are disrespecting me like that? I'll show you what 'hurt' is..."

I would have gone at him again if he hadn't retreated further into the cabin with his hands held up in surrender.

"Who the hell are you and why are you assaulting me with a stick," He questioned unsurely, glancing around the room looking for the exit. Too bad I was standing right in front of it.

"Me assaulting you? You know what assaulted me? Your tongue! And don't you dare--" I was cut off by a familiar chuckle.

I could feel Johnny's presence behind me.  The asswipe was enjoying this. I could tell.

"This is too good!  Joshua Lachowski rejected by this," he claimed while pointing a thin finger at me.

"What? She came on to me! Shut your mouth and tell me who the girl is," Joshua said, finally getting annoyed. I realized that he didn't like Johnny almost as much as I didn't. I really did not appreciate sharing a common subject of loathing with the idiot.

"Oh it gets better! This, my little Joshy, is Lilly Fetcher your new manager," Johnny finished his revelation with a dramatic sweep of his hands over my face. I resisted the urge to whack him with one of the chopsticks. I decided to use my new weapon for when he really pissed me off.