Confess (A Severus Snape Fanfiction - SSxOC)

Chapter 18

As the days turned into weeks and winter had finally arrived with heavy snowfalls, the Hogwarts students had eventually lost interest in gossiping about Professor Snape's new relationship. It had become a common sight to find him strolling down the corridors with Samara, hand in hand, exchanging affectionate intimacies whenever they felt unobserved. The students' secret expectation, though, that his grumpy attitude in class was going to change now that he had a girlfriend, was left unfulfilled. He was as strict as ever, deducting points whenever he saw it fit, which happened quite frequently, much to the Gryffindors' dismay.

Samara's life at school, however, changed drastically right after her official introduction as Severus' girlfriend at the breakfast table. There was no bullying anymore; everyone was too afraid of the consequences. It was a by now well-known fact that Professor Snape was very protective of her, punishing the tiniest jokes and teasing comments severely; a fact that also added to her loner status, since no one ever spoke to her anymore. No one even dared to openly look at her, since even that could be misinterpreted and lead to draconian punishments, which usually consisted of scrubbing cauldrons all night, cleaning the bathrooms on every floor, or even accompanying Hagrid on his many dangerous missions in the Forbidden Forest.

Samara became a living ghost, deprived of any social interactions. Behind her back, of course, people were still talking about her. No longer was she the "weirdo with the ridiculous crush on a teacher" but rather the "dungeon bat's new plaything". Even though it hurt her immensely when she overheard the Slytherins calling her those names, she wouldn't have wanted to change anything. Her heart and soul belonged entirely to the professor, and she would gladly endure any kind of animosity from the others just to be with him.

Severus knew that. It pained him that he was not able to make life at Hogwarts easier for her; however much he tried to make up for any hostility that was aimed at her when the two of them were alone, he was aware that it did not change the fact that she still was an outcast, even more so than before. Despite her reassurances that none of it did bother her, he knew all too well that this was a lie; a lie fabricated to put him at ease. He felt incredibly guilty for having caused her misery.

He was, on the other hand, the only person who could make her face light up in pure joy; all it took was a gentle touch of his hand, a soft kiss on her lips, or a loving word. In those intimate moments, it was all that mattered. Her happiness was contagious, and he felt his hard shell melt every time he looked into those radiant eyes that held nothing but sincere adoration for him. Whenever their eyes met, he knew. He knew she loved him deeply, to a point of absolute devotion. This made it even harder for him. The guilt was constantly present, persistently gnawing at him, threatening to devour him whole. He would never be able to compensate for the sacrifices she had so willingly offered, just to be his. He was not the perfect man she thought him to be. Sooner or later, she would recognize him for who he truly was; a bringer of death to the people he cared about, and it would all come crashing down on him like a monstrous tidal bore, ready to swallow him, ready to consume him. With every loving smile she gave him, with every tender caress she shared with him, with every unshed tear hidden in the impenetrable depths of her hazel eyes, he could sense the inevitable doom that was looming in the dark corners of the near future. It was going to destroy him. Moreover, it was going to destroy her, and he would not have been Severus Snape, had he not tried to fix it.