The Song Left Unstarted (Gerard Way)

Chapter 24 - Frank.

Frank' POV.

"I'll go back to the bus, watch over Gerard, okay?" I say to Mikey and Ray.

They both nod at me and take a drink out of their beer cans. I turn around and start heading towards our bus, putting my hands in my pockets due to the cold weather. It was around 7 pm, and I knew that Mikey and Ray would come back late, and because Gerard was in the bus all alone, I decided to take care of him.  

He worries me, a lot. He's on a lot of antidepressants, and with that he was drowning himself with alcohol. No one in the band knew why he was like this, not even Mikey. I figured it was because of the whole 9/11 incident, but it was two years ago, surely he would be over it. There was something he wasn't telling us, and I think that something is the reason why he's so, depressed. I want him to get better, I really do. I want him to open up and tell us what he's feeling, because he never does; and when we do push him to telling, he just stops talking. 

A sigh escapes my mouth, as I open the bus doors and enter the vehicle. When I walk in, the sound of someone sobbing filled my ears. My eyes went wide when I saw Gerard curled up in a fetal position on the floor, crying. I've never seen him cry before, and it wasn't a normal cry; his sobs were loud, his breathing too, it seems as if he was trying so hard not to cry but couldn't stop. He was breathing so hard out of his mouth, that he was gasping for air. His hair was covering his face, but I could see his eyes. 

"Gerard?" I call out. He doesn't look up. "Are you okay?"

I wait for him to respond, but nothing replaced the sound of him crying. When I couldn't take it anymore, I walked up to him and sat down on the floor next to him. My heart was hurting, seeing him like this; he was so, vulnerable. I start to stroke his back, and soon his breathing starts to calm down.

"I'm okay." He whimpered, his voice was hoarse from the crying.

My eyebrows furrowing, I turn my body so I could see his face.

"No you're not Gerard. Stop telling everyone you're okay. I've never seen you cry this hard, ever. There's something that's bothering you, and if you don't tell us, we can't help you get better. We're all worried about you, Gerard. We want you to get better. It hurts, Gerard. It hurts me seeing you like this. Please talk to me, and please don't lie to me."  I say almost shouting.

A sigh escapes his mouth, and he gets up and sits next to me. He wraps his arms around my waist, and buries his wet face on my neck. I was confused at first, but soon wrap my arms around him. I soon understand that he needs someone to hold him, he was always alone.

"Are you okay, Gerard?" 

"No," he whispers, "I'm not okay."

I nod and start stroking his back, feeling his breathing become slower and slower. 

"Can you tell me what's wrong, Gerard? Please?" 

I feel his tears rolling down my neck, and his breathing starting to become faster. I knew I shouldn't of asked that. I look down to see him shaking his head profusely. Sobs start to come out of his mouth, and I continue stroking his side. 

"Hey, no don't cry, it's okay. You don't have to tell me." I whisper into his ear.

His breathing becomes louder and louder, and the gasping noise returns; his tears were rolling fast down his cheek and staining my t-shirt. No matter what I could do, I couldn't stop him.

"I miss her, Frank" he says, sobbing, "I miss her." He starts to repeat it over and over, his gasps and sobs interrupting him. 

"I know, it's okay. You and Elena were so close." I say stroking his hair.