This Is War [sequel to So Cold]

01: Note

 Kyla's POV

He slung his arm collectively on top of my shoulders, his fingertips occasionally grazing against the sun-kissed skin of my bare shoulder. With shades protecting both of our eyes from the sun's rays, we walked around the concrete pathways of Lowell, our Vans scraping against the cracked concrete below our feet. Lowell's people should have really considered investing in new pathways in order to prevent the possibility for an unlucky or rather clumsy individual to catch their foot and fall forward.

Ouch.

However, it was too much to ask Lowell's mayor for anything like that. Investing money to fix large cracks in sidewalks was not my intended point. My point was that so much could happen - if you're catching my flow by now.

I understand, it was a couple of years ever since such a thing had happened, but my blood still rushed with anxiety. My memory about every specific detail was vague, but there were still some fragments of scenes that I could recall, whether it was watching a house burn to sinful ashes or looking on as a certain individual was executed.

Most of the memories consisted of painful ones - whether they made me cringe, made my blood surge hotly through my veins, or if they made tears well up at the brims of my eyes. I preferred not to think too much about it, but I simply couldn't help it at times. I would see something that reminded me of just that one terrible time in my life and I could become a train wreck.

Sometimes I thought that I was too hung up about the subject. After all, it had been over two years after it had actually happened. That was when I would ask someone like Calum about the whole situation. I would ask him related questions like: Am I being a bit too hung up about this one thing, or is it reasonable?

Every time he answered, it would roll around the same answer: Of course not. Something like would scare anyone. Afterall, you've seen things that people could only dream of. It isn't your fault that these memories keep coming back into your head. Blah, blah, blah, and he would drag on and on and tell me that none of it was my fault.

However, it was a problem that I could never jump over. It was and it always will be a hard obstacle for me to overcome. I was buried beneath the grief of what I had lost, and who I had once trusted. 

No matter what he said in an effort to make things seem different, I couldn't help but to think otherwise. Our thoughts always seemed to differ.

"Stop being so distant," Calum's edgy tone snapped me out from my deep thoughts, his arm slightly slapping at my skin. His arm dropped from my shoulder, causing me to frown a bit.

I was brought to a sudden halt when Calum's hands tightly gripped me by my shoulders, turning me to face him. His coffee brown eyes dug into me, making me swallow thickly in response. His eyes could say more than words. I shrugged his hands off, stepping backwards to increase the space between us.

"I don't like the way you're looking at me," I said, my arms crossing my chest. My eyes fell to the pale pavement underneath my dark Vans.

Calum scoffed. "Guess what, Kyla? I could never give two shits about how 'you don't like the way that I am looking at you'. I would really appreciate it if you would stop zoning out on me and drifting into a whole different world. Honestly, it's scaring me to the point where I'm beginning to think you're getting..."

He hesitated, drawing back his full bottom lip between his teeth. His eyes drifted away from mine, finding their way to look at the ground as if the cracks in the pavement suddenly became the most interesting thing in the world. He was trying to find the correct word.

"Getting what, Calum?" I began, my patience beginning to wear to the width of a sheet of paper.

Calum's long fingers threaded through his dark hair, his eyes flickering upward to meet my gaze once again. Now that he was stumbling and struggling to find the appropriate words to say, I didn't  feel as intimidated by him as I was seconds before.