The Reason (Completed)

Letter 2

To the person who is holding this letter, 


Did you read my last two letters? I mean, are you the same person who is reading this letter too? If you are, I wanna tell you that for the first time I've thought that, do grandparents really treat their grandkids like that? Saying mean stuffs to hurt our feelings? Don't they love me? Aren't they happy because they have me as their grandchild? Why did my lola called me disrespectful? Remeber when I said that I cried? That's the first time I cried because of them. Because of my lola... The sad thing is, it's not tears of joy. Tears of joy that maybe, lola bought me the stuff that I like, or cooked me my favorite food. But no, it's not tears of joy...



*****

The moment I entered my room, I started crying. 

What have I ever done for my lola to say that I'm disrespectful? As far as I know, I've done nothing. 

I hugged my teddy bear and cried silently. After a few minutes, my eyes ran dry and tears can't be produced anymore. So I went to drink water downstairs. Alam kong sa mga oras na yun ay tulog na ang lolo't lola ko kaya bumaba na ko. 

I won't risk to see her. I think... There's a part inside my heart that hated her already...  But I know that it's not a good thing to keep.

Hatred.

That's why I insisted myself to not hate her. And remember that she is still my grandmother. 

The house was dark so I stumbled a few times going down. 

As I opened the lights inside the kitchen. I was shocked. Hell, I was petrified.

Scared. Terrified.

I can't find the right word to explain how I feel...

Because what I saw was traumatic.

"Freah?!" He shouted. He was shocked maybe. Of course. Sinong hindi magugulat kung sarili mong apo ang nakakita na pinagsasamantalahan mo yung bata niyong katulong? 

He pushed ate outside the kitchen and he tried to walk to me. But before he got close. I shouted at him.

"Don't! Wag kang lalapit sakin!" As I shout, my tears came back and I ran upstairs.

I locked my door and went to bed. 

I can't sleep. How could I? 

I just saw my grandfather cornering my ate, and cupping her breasts! How could he?! 

Nasabi ko sainyo na dapat wala na kaming maids diba? But she... She was an exception. I love her. She's the only person who can understand me aside from my bestfriend. She's the only person I can talk to when nobody's around.

And now, this?! Is God fcking kidding with me?! Just this afternoon, my grandma despise me for being disrespectful. It wasn't even an official problem. And now? I just saw my granfather doing that to her?! How could he?! 

Niyakap ko binti ko... Trying to erase that picture in my mind. But I can't... I just can't... 

Then I heard a knock on the door.

I asked who.

And I knew that It was him... Because of his voice. It's old and husky. 

Scared, I opened my door slowly.

He grabbed me, went inside the room and warned me.

"Wag na wag mong sasabihin kahit kanino yung nangyari. Nagkakaintindihan ba tayo? Pag nalaman kong sumuway ka. Hindi mo alam kung anong mangyayari." He said as he cupped my breast. I fought back but, he's stronger than me. Knowing I couldn't do anything, I just cried... And said, 

"I won't tell anyone... I promise..." I said to the devil infront of me. I can no longer think of him as my grandfather...