Finding Kat [styles au]

thirteen

13

Lucy didn’t react to the kiss. She just froze by Harry’s sudden action. She wanted so hard to give in to the kiss and put her hand on Harry’s neck but she didn’t do it. She felt she didn’t deserve to do so. Harry seemed to notice because he broke the kiss but his large hand was still holding Lucy’s jaw in place.

Tears started to pool in Lucy’s eyes. Her hand touched Harry’s hand on her jaw to pull it away. She got up from the bed and sat on the desk chair. “Why? I mean . . . how?” As she voiced out the question, the tears were already falling down her face.

“Lucy . . .” Harry said softly instead of answering the question.

When Lucy saw Harry was walking towards her, she quickly said, “Harry, please. Just sit on the bed.” Her hands wiped the tears on her cheeks once she successfully stopped crying.

“I just joined all the dots, Lucy.” Harry replied after settling on the bed. “You looked the same but with different personalities . . .”

Lucy scoffed before laughing humorlessly, “You must be thinking I’m a fucked up. It’s alright. I am actually.”

Harry inhaled a breath as he got up to walk towards where Lucy was sitting. He towered over her with his tall in height. “Tell me. Tell me, Lucy. What . . . what happened? Why are you like this?”

“I’ll start to cry if I tell you.” She replied truthfully with her eyes meeting Harry’s green ones. Harry would be the first person to know why she’s acting like this and she was afraid. Afraid that Harry will run away and think she’s mad. “I’m serious.”

The curly-haired boy took Lucy’s hands in his own and there was a smile on his face. “I’ll be there to wipe the tears away, okay?” He backed away to pull Lucy onto her own feet. “Let’s get comfortable, yeah?”

Lucy stood at the end of the bed while Harry arranged the pillows to make the bed somewhat comfortable. She just admired Harry’s concentrated look on his face and it was so endearing. After it was sorted out, Harry clasped his hand in Lucy’s and lied on the bed after she did.

“So tell me.” He murmured, “I want to know.”

There was a lump in her throat. Lucy didn’t want to tell Harry about it. She didn’t want to move on. But in the back of her mind, she knew Harry deserved to know the story because after all, he was the only one who took his time to be friends with her even though she was lying the whole time.

 “I had a twin.” Lucy started after she plucked up every ounce of courage in her. “Her name was Kat. She had black hair just like me but she’s Kat. She is the outgoing one and wild one so she dyed her hair with the most outrageous colours there are after my parents gave her the permission.” She sat up and looked at Harry, “The ones that I have now are fake. They’re just stupid hair extensions.” One by one, Lucy clipped them off from her hair.

“I was always in her shadow. I was never known as Lucy for who I am. I was always known as Lucy, Kat’s shy twin. I didn’t care. Kat was always nice to me and we did everything together despite our differences. I love how she is so confident but I’m not.”

“She’s . . . dead?” Harry questioned with both of his elbows propped up beside him.

Lucy sighed, “Along with my parents. They had a car crash on their way to pick me up from a library. See, I am the twin who likes to read and write while Kat loves to party and flirt. My parents were dead when the ambulance arrived but Kat wasn’t. I actually thought she’s going to survive. But she didn’t.”

It was three months since Lucy’s family died but it still felt like it was yesterday. It pained her to think back about the horrid day but for Harry, she endured it.

“I remember her last words to me.” A tear rolled down her cheek as her mind was taking her back to the scene, “Lucy, I want you to be happy with who you are. You can find that confidence in you. You can. We’re twins so you do have it. I love you.”

Harry’s hand reached up to brush Lucy’s wet cheeks, “Hey, stop crying, Lucy.” That seemed to make Lucy pulled herself together and dried her tears by herself.

“So I moved from the old town. I was sent to my aunt’s, Mrs. Winters. She’s my aunt. And she had been so understanding and so lovely. I’m so glad she’s the one who gets to keep me.”

One of Harry’s eyebrows rose as he asked, “Your aunt is the history teacher at our school?”

“Shocker.” retorted Lucy.

“How about Zayn?”

“Zayn?” She rose an eyebrow curiously at the mention of the dark-haired boy, “Well, he knew Kat. He saw me at a club when I was being Kat. I just couldn’t act like her in front of him so I pulled him out of the place and explained to him that I’m not her.”

Harry didn’t ask any questions after that. He was silent as he laid on the bed with his hands folded on his stomach. Lucy understood. It was a lot to take in but she couldn’t help to think about what thoughts were circulating in Harry’s mind.

“Do you think I’m weird?” whispered Lucy as she played with the ends of her hair.

The question caused Harry to sit up from the bed with a serious look painted on his face. “What?! No. I just . . . it was a lot to process, okay?”

Lucy chuckled, “I thought so.”

“Don’t be mad at me but . . . don’t you think you should see a doctor? I mean, you need to learn to say good bye to Kat that still somehow lives in you.” Harry stated with a squeeze on Lucy’s hand.

“Okay.” Lucy mumbled. “But, only if you dye your hair first. After all, I am the winner.”

Harry laughed with his head thrown back, “I thought you’ve forgotten about that.”

They spent the rest of the afternoon in Lucy’s bed as Harry fired more questions due to his curiousity and Lucy answered every single one of them, feeling thankful that someone finally took notice of her without Kat by her side.

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