A Cry Out To Jesus (The Extended Hobson Family Triliogy: Book 1)

The Day I Almost Died

1 year later

This is my least proud moment. I wish I would never had done this. Then again, it helped me value my life more. Life is so precious, so I will never take it for granted again.

                                                  **********************************************

I was rich now, but money couldn't buy happiness. Up to this point, I never told anyone just how much money Matt gave me, not even the Jackson's, who had done so much for me. I was a miserable, rich, wreck. I was only 17 and considered committing suicide everyday for those two weeks. I still had my whole life in front of me to live, I didn't know what I was thinking.

I would sit in my room and sulk about my life everyday after coming home from school. "I hate my life. No one around here seems to care if I'm even alive anymore. I wonder if anyone would even care if I just left the world." I had been saying things like this to myself for the past week, while holding a small handful of my mom's depression meds in my palm.

"I just want to have someone love me. The one constant I needed was never here, I just thought he was. There is no God, if there was then he wouldn't have let so many bad things happen to me. My dad left me with Andy and Mom when I was 12. Then Mom marries an amazing guy, that I didn't care about at first, but grew to love. The only boy I could see myself growing old with died in a boating accident. About the same time that happens, my brother turns towards drugs and just ignores me for 2 years, before coming to know "God". Then he moves away to live with Dad, without taking me with him, we still talk but it isn't the same. Then my best friend moved to New York with her family, we haven't spoken for almost a year now. She made new friends and basically forgot about me. The only good thing that happened to me was Mom marrying Matt, but that turned sour when Matt died. Now I have no one, Mom included. She must hate me, because all we can seem to do is fight with each other. Maybe if I just take these pills, my worries will be over with. No one seems to care about me anymore, so why not just give up on them. They've already given up on me." I brought the pills up to my mouth, but just before I could put them in m mouth and swallow away my worries, my mom walks into my room. I was so shocked to see her here that I forgot what I was about to do.

"Amelia Alexis Applegate! Don't you dare take those! Give them to me, now!" My mom practically yelled at me. So I gave her the handful of pills. "What were you thinking? Taking this many of these could have killed you!"

"I was thinking that no one would care if I died. No one around here seems to care about me anymore, especially not you. You never seem to care about anyone but yourself."

"You know that's not true. I care about you, I just have a different way of showing it."

"Like not letting me end my miserable life now. You just love to see me suffer from all the loss I've had, don't you?"

"You know what? I don't care about what you do. You can go jump off a bridge for all I care. You are a spoiled brat. You aren't the only one who has lost someone before. You didn't lose your husband."