Relearning How to Love (on hold)

Chapter 1

Pic of Rosaline on the side.

"No," the word bounced around in my mind. I sat up in my bed, my body covered in damp sweat. The pain in my chest seemed to pulse more than usual.

Every night the same dream. The same memory. The memory of losing my mate. The pain in my chest caused me to double over. I shoved my sweaty hand into my mouth to stop the scream that was trying to escape.

I untangled my legs from my sheets and stood up on unsteady feet. I needed it, the need making my brain go on autopilot as I stumbled to the other side of the room. My chest throbbed and pulsed in pain, but I managed to open the door to the closet.

I dug under the piles of clothes and flung them aside. The need so overwhelming, I felt as if I was being crushed. My flying hands hit something solid. The box. I ripped it out from the other clothes and placed it on the floor next to me.

The pain loosened a little bit from the proximity. "No, I promised myself I would not do it" I told myself under my breath. Over and over again I said it. I slowly rocked back and forth. "Don't do it" I urged myself.

I need it! My wolf screamed at me.

I was undone. I lovingly yet briskly opened the box and the scent assaulted me. Kyle. The pain stopped and I slowly started to grab hold of the reins of my mind, but it was not enough. I picked up the small bit of red fabric, all that I had left of him. I caressed the fabric and held it to my nose.

My eyes closed and memories assulted me.

Me swinging on the swings and Kyle pushing me. The sun shining down as he buys me a chocolate ice cream. His laugh warming and comforting me.

2 days after we met.

Walking through the park. Kyle's big warm hand wrapped around mine. Telling each other about our lives.

3 days.

Laying in my bed after collapsing there after it seemed like we bought half of the clothes in the mall. Him turning over and his grey eyes catching my own blue ones. Staring at each other for what seemed like an eternity, before he slowly got on top of me and pierced my neck with his teeth.

1 week.

Walking around school with his arm around my shoulder, snarling at the guys that dared even glance my way.

9 days.

Bringing me to the fanciest Italian restaurant in town and then going to friendlys after we saw all the snobby dressed up adults. Laughing as he told the waiter that he wanted just an ice cream of the kids menu because he wanted to put extra gummy bears on his.

11 days.

Running side by side in the forest, my white and grey coat sticking out against his black fur. Jumping over streams to get to our favorite hunting ground.

13 days.

In a car, going to a super secret location and then driving off a bridge.

14 days.

2 weeks I had with him. Two weeks I got to spend with my mate. My Kyle. A sharp scent caught my nose.

Blood, my wolf told me.

Panic flooded through my veins and I struggled to sit up. I dropped the cloth. It made a soft whisper as it hit the ground and I immediately went and picked it up. "What am I going to do with myself" I sighed. I slowly put the cloth back into the box and reluctantly put the box back into its place on the floor of my closet.

I turned and saw clothes thrown all over the room. I picked them up and shoved them back onto the floor of the closet. I turned and walked over to my bed. The covers looked slightly damp and I thought about going and doing something else, but then a wave of exhaustion hit me and I quickly climbed back into bed.

I still had to face school tomorrow. Fun...