The Gun Wants Me *currently writing and editing*

Chapter 22

Copyrights 2014 © Elena Sgro

All Rights Reserved

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Chapter 22:

After finishing some paperwork I had the inkling feeling that I needed to call D'Angelo. For the past hour I had tried to file some paperwork to get my desk under control so that I could prepare for more work to come in, but the whole time I had an eerie feeling in the back of my mind and a sinking feeling in my heart that wouldn't let me concentrate.

The way he made me feel this morning was indescribable, we hadn't done anything besides share stolen kisses here and there and just talk, but I was beginning to feel comfortable around him. I no longer felt like I had to be uptight and hold a guard up against him for the fear of him trying to get into my pants.

Of course, I still had that fear that he only wanted me for sex, but I didn't hold such a grudge towards him because deep down I wanted him just as badly as he wanted me. The only difference was that I wanted our time together to mean something, and no matter how much D'Angelo said that he wanted more than just sex. I couldn't fully bring myself to believe it. 

That was the sinking feeling in my heart. I missed him, I actually missed him and his presences in my house. Having him here brought on a sense of security. Masculinity that the place was missing and now that he was gone I felt alone, truly alone. I had lived in my house by myself for a while now and never had I felt the isolation I felt at this very moment. 

Huffing a sigh I dropped the group of papers in my hand on my desk and got my nerves under control and held down the urge to call D'Angelo. My gaze glided to the phone and I gazed at it wistfully. All I had to do was pick it up and dial the very number – that I had somehow come to memorise – that would direct me his amazing voice.

I pushed the phone away rejecting the idea to call him. I had to be strong. He had just left maybe an hour ago and even though I was starting to be more open with him and accept his presence in my life. Calling him would just make me seem needy and scared and my pride won out this time. 

Pushing my chair away from my desk, I decided to remove myself from my study so I wouldn't be tempted to use the phone and call D'Angelo. I needed to stop thinking about him. I needed to get this man out of my system somehow, with sexual release, and if I called him that wouldn't help me at all. 

Going through the house, I checked the lock on the front door was firmly in place. I took in a deep breath calming my unsettling nerves. My whole body was on high alert after the shooting at the cafe, the text message and the strange car that had driven past. I knew I was being stupid for wallowing in my house alone and not calling the man that I knew deep down inside could protect me, but my pride had gotten the best of me.

Realising that my hands were shaking when I looked down I went straight for the kitchen, hoping that a cup of green tea would calm me like it usually did. Whenever I was under stress or unease green tea always seemed to help and I was hoping that this time when I indulged in the lovely herbs, the calming effects would be no different.

Just as I was about to take a sip of the brewed herbs a knock sounded at the door causing me to just and soil of the contents of my mug onto me. I hissed through my teeth from the pain and bit back a cursed as I made my way out of the kitchen.

Panic resided in my chest as I crept to the front door. I wasn't expecting anyone over and, no one had texted me to say they were stopping by last minute. So my brain was making up different scenarios of who it could be and what they wanted.