Payment

Walk Away From the Pain

Note: Rewritten but not triple checked for spelling and grammatical errors. If you see one feel free to comment

He was like a statue, as still as stone and hardened off as such. There wasn't a single movement as I approached. Sitting here, frozen, It was like he didn't even know I was there. He was too consumed in his thoughts, in what had happened. It was just as Vera had said. He was scared to face me.

"Why don't I go get diner ready early. I bet everyone's hungry." She left us in the dark room alone, the light following her out to escape into the hall. 

I knew somewhat where things were. This room, constructed identical to mine, was stagnant, unmoving. The lantern was exactly where I had remembered seeing it earlier. I lit it, sending a luminescent glow to cast over Dominik's slumped back. 

I went to him and knelt at his feet, taking both of his arms in my hands and pulled them away from his face. When the light caught his features it warmed my chest. As if chasing the butterflies into a frenzy, I suddenly felt like what had happened was miles away. All that mattered was him.

"You said there was a lake?" My voice was rusty, coarse from screaming.

My words caught onto his sadness and tipped up his lips into a little smile. I tried to be like Giovanni, I tried to push my thoughts and emotions into his head. I wanted to say so many things but I didn't have the heart to possibly make him fall deeper into a depression. I just wanted him to know what I felt without having to say it. I wanted him to be hung on the fact I was alive and that nothing else really mattered.

He seemed to receive part of the message at least. I say it twinkle behind his eyes. Subtle and beautiful, a blinding collection of stars hid behind his green sea of a gaze. His big hands rose to cup my face. Softly his thumbs brushed over my plumpened cheeks. It hurt, but it felt so comforting I refused to stop him.

"We can go whenever you want." He hummed softly. I could hear the darkness edging his words, seeping into his tone to make it miserable. "It's not that far away."

I nodded, waiting for him to absorb all things I so desperately shoved at his mind. I wanted to turn his mood around, even just a little bit. 

"It's getting cold." I scooted closer, placing my hands gingerly on his knees. "Is there a cabin?"

This time he nodded, looking deeply into my eyes. He remained silent, his flingers snaking back past my face and into my hair. I closed my eyes to the feeling of him softly massaging my scalp. It felt like I was shot into the sky, suspended in air and surrounded by millions of dizzying clouds. I snickered to myself, turning to jelly. Distracted, hypnotized by the tingling sensation radiating through my head, I hadn't expected him to kiss me. It was so gentle and sad, pressing with the lightest touch. One peck turned into two, until he laid a long sorrowful press against my buzzing lips.

My fingers mindlessly pushed at his thighs, my body leaning in to dip between his legs. It was so sweet and so slow. Time paused for us as he took his time, parading around my mouth with care. I melted into him.

"I'm sorry." He whispered against my face, his voice weak.

He kissed me once more, this time hard and brutal. It crushed my lips and made me wince but filled me to the brim with this raw, hot energy. When he pulled away I knew he saw it because it was shining right back at me through his heavy gaze.

"I'm sorry." He repeated.

There was something about his apology that told me it was more than just for what had happened today. He wasn't just apologizing for the twins attacking me, he was begging my forgiveness for everything. The attack, the secrets, the fact he couldn't explain a million things, it was all in those two words. And I took them, acknowledging that being here, with him, was going to be like this for a very long time. But I also knew someday, when he was ready, he would tell me. Just as Vera had said, they were doing what they had to do. I respected that.

"It's okay." I smiled up at him, brushing the hair out of his face so that I could dip in one last time to steal a kiss of my own. 

When I open my eyes again his face was lit with a beautiful light. It highlighted his features, making them glow and appear warmer than a ray of sun piercing the sky. He was a dark prince under an ever flattering spotlight. It sent a weakness shooting through me, making me crave for another blissful touch. But I simply stared at him in awe for a moment, taking in all the sharp lines and smooth dark skin, until he looked directly at the light being shown in through the open door. 

"I'm sorry to interrupt." Kana voice made me jump, my hands pulling away from Dominik, my fingers flying to hide my tingling lips. "Dinners ready. But first, Rozalina, can I talk to you?"

My wide eyes took in her form, small and red from crying. She sniffled, slapping away fresh tears.

"Yes!'" I stammered, throwing myself to my feet.

I didn't know why I was embarrassed. Maybe it was because I had been so bold as to make a move on my own. I wasn't sure, but it fluttered like anxiety across my flushed neck.

I stepped into the hallway, peering back at Dominik as he left us to have a moment of privacy. There was still a weight pressing at his shoulders. I saw it drag his demeanor down and away from his princely nature. If felt wrong to let him walk away all on his own. I itched to race after him.

"I should clear a few things up." She sighed. The seriousness of her tone made it seem like this was about to be a face to face, eyes to eyes, conversation. I didn't want to have her pouring her heart out while I looked back and ogled her brother, so I stood at attention, my eyes locked on hers.

"I know I've been acting strange the past couple days." There was a heaviness to her voice. "I'm torn. Ever since we were kids I've been so in love with Giovanni."

She looked at me like the world was crashing around inside her head. It was not only an apology but proof, she was more that she had appeared to be. I had a feeling she was about to tell me things she's been holding on the tip of her tongue for so long. I wanted her to spill, to get the satisfaction of getting it all out before I applied a silent judgment.

But I couldn't stop the nagging at the back of my mind that found her declaration hurtful. It stung at my heart, piercing it with a little hole.

"I know he's a horrible person." She wiped at her wet eyes, continuing in a rush. "But there's this thing in me that wont let go of him. No matter how many men I use to try and fill the void, its always him!"

I took her hand in mine, encasing it with warm and pressing it to my hurting heart. I willed her to go on despite her choking on her own words.

"I'm so sorry he did those things to you." As if she couldn't breathe, she inhaled a sharp breath, straightening up to let it fill her. "I need you to understand that I don't want to love him. I've tired so hard to fight it and it kills me inside knowing that he's trying to-"

She bit her lip, looking away from me before another tear fell.

"Stop." My voice shocked her, making her flinch. I grabbed her face and forced her to look me in the eyes. I had to tell her the things I hadn't had the courage to tell Dominik. I couldn't sit back and see them both break, especially not when it stemmed from something that had happened to me. "I don't have to understand. These are your feeling and I have no right to judge them. You would never hurt me. I know that and its the only thing that matters."

Peaceful relief inflated her magnificent eyes, her lips pressing tight as she took my words at face value. Unlike her brother, I saw the changes, the uplifting glow of her expression. And as we headed to the dinning room to share a meal, I left the memories of Giovanni and Renee behind.