White Rose - A Peter Pan Fanfiction

Chapter 20

I returned to the camp in silence, a sickening feeling in my stomach. I didn't know what to feel, full-stop. I was so conflicted and, fortunate to Pan, I was lost. I wondered how long this feeling would last - and if it would ever end. But in Neverland, time stood still and ironically, I had all the time in the universe to figure out Pan's game. Speak of the devil...

"There you are, love," Pan smirked, walking towards me from the opposite side. "Had a nice talk with the fish?"

My eyes snapped open and my stomach twisted - everything today...I kept myself hidden, I made sure I wasn't being tracked, so how did he even know? "Don't look so surprised. I have eyes and ears everywhere. I thought you knew that by now. " I rolled back my lips as he approached me, standing mere inches from myself. "Give me my dagger," he sneered, cold and hard. I wondered if he still held any feelings for me - or whether they had simple evaporated like the salt in the ocean. Oh shut up, Serena, that's just Killian and the mermaids getting to you. He just wants his weapon back and technically, I did steal it.

"Don't you trust me?" I said innocently, smiling and trying to...calm him, but his bland eyes stared back at me, his jaw clenched and perfectly stiff like stoned sculpture. He started chuckling, taking the tip of my chin in his thumb and pointer-finger, tilting my head upwards just a tad. 

"Of course," he said, grinning down at me before dropping his hand, turning on his heels and heading towards the weaponry stand. "Until Baelfire is a boy, I'll be training the boys here everyday."

"Are we preparing for a war?" I said with a laugh, not taking my own question seriously. Pan grabbed a crossbow, eying it carefully as he lifted it. 

"Of sorts, love."

"With whom?" I asked, half-agitated that he was refusing to tell me any information. Surely he can't be angry that I slept in my old cabin last night. "Peter, tell me."

"It doesn't concern you," he charmed, raising an eyebrow as he placed the crossbow back down, leaning against the nearest tree with folded arms. 

I sternly walked up to him, my fists balled and chest heaving with breaths. I felt so small compared to him, but I didn't care - I never have.

"What the hell is your problem? Don't you care enough to -?"

"I care more than enough," he snapped, standing up straight and eying me down. "And that's exactly why I'm-"

"Keeping things from me?" I butted in, clenching my jaw. "Remember what I said last time?"

"Oh, is that a threat?" he chuckled, clearly amused at this argument we were having. "Hold your tongue," he said, his smirk fading. I kept my place, eying him down just as much as he was doing to me, and I thought about how things were beginning to change. Just as I was about to place my hand on his cheek, his hand snapped up and grabbed my wrist, a gasp suddenly escaping my lips. The hold was strong - almost painful - but I didn't try to pull away and nor did I wince. With eyes as poisonous as a snake's venom, he glared into mine, leaning his head down slightly. 

"Don't use my mercy as a privilege," he sneered quietly and I blinked, gulping down the dryness in my throat. He couldn't even said the word love. He said bloody mercy. I nodded in defeat, refusing to let the tears fall as my eyes began to water. Letting go of my hand, he placed a rough kiss against my forehead and walked away, his back to mine. As soon as his body had disappeared, I fell to my knees and placed my hands against my face, beginning to cry. The pain in my chest - oh how it ached... It felt as if I was being burned alive and that my rib cage was crushing, stopping me from breathing properly. The tears fell beyond my control and I didn't move my hands - I wanted to keep my pain hidden, like my hands were some sort of mask.