Some call it love [NaNoWriMo13]

21 - Some call it love

I feel sorry for Terrence, I honestly do, because when he sent Connor and I back, the tension was suffocating for me, so I was sure Terrence was aware about  it. I mean, how hard was it to observe the sudden coldness from Connor towards me, and vice versa?

I mean if the dirty looks he sent me were any indication, I'd be an idiot not to notice. And if looks could kill, he's been murdering me so many times with the looks that he sends me. That guy was such a jerk, yet I couldn't stop the thoughts of wanting him back away from me. I wanted them to stop, but there seemed to be nothing that repel the thoughts of wanting him back in my life. 

It was irrational, and there seemed to be nothing that I could do to stop them. I tried everything I could muster to hate him, but nothing seemed to be working. And the more my mind pictured him with Kelly Morgan, my heart just broke even more. His words were on constant replay throughout my mind, and I knew that it was my fault thinking that he would want me back, much more that he would be the one who would willingly come to me. 

And what did I get? I got my heart broken a second time by the exact same person who broke it the first. How pathetic was that? I mean, honestly, did the proverb once bitten twice shy mean nothing to me? Was I so susceptible to getting hurt. Why?

I guess I had to be pretty masochistic to keep putting my heart out on the line to get broken again. If I thought that I would be the one with the advantage just because I thought that I could get Connor on my side again, I couldn't have been more wrong. How could I be so stupid!

Terrence too must've noticed my terrible mood, because once Connor got out of the car, he made me get out as well, and then he wrapped me up in one of his hugs, which I happily stepped into. At this point, I ignored the fact that he was absolutely sweaty, and smelly and everything that I hated and then let him wrap his arms around me. I even cried on his shoulder, where he stroked my frizzy hair which had come out of its ponytail over and over again. I was turning into such a sap, and I really wasn't happy about that. 

Terrence got me to take a shower as he too took his. Then, he came into my room to check on me. He had managed to get mum to back down on the questions, and he brought back the sandwiches she had made for our lunch. I took them from him gratefully and took one bite from it. It was tuna. Mum was really trying her luck to get back on my happy side. I knew this because she knew that tuna was my guilty pleasure. I guess I would have to talk to her one of these days, because I guess I did owe her an apology for my rather irrational behaviour lately. 

We both sat on my bed, eating sandwiches. I explained the whole thing to him, leaving out the parts in which I had told Connor which got him talking to me in the first place. I made it seem as if he had just approached me. Okay fine, I twisted the story a lot. 

This is what I said: 

"Well, when you all left, I went to get myself a cup of water because I was thirsty, then he followed me."

That's what I told Terrence happened. I felt bad about lying to him, and much more twisting the story to make it seem as if he was the one in the wrong, but I had to, if not the whole soccer team would be at his doorstep demanding how he could choose Kelly over them. I never understood his reasons, but I hoped it was something good, because I was lying to Terrence, the only one who has ever been there for me all the time, to protect his sorry bottom. 

It had better be good. 

By the time I was done telling him about what had happened, my tears had been all dried by him, and he seemed rather upset. That part was pretty obvious in the way he didn't talk. He let me lean my head on him as I continued to stare at the house opposite ours, namely Connor's. Terrence knew who's house that was, and thankfully, he didn't know that it was also Connor's room which was facing mine, and sometimes, I wished that I didn't know either. So, whenever I saw a silhouette in the room I would be left guessing as to who it was. And whenever I saw a second figure, I could think that it was simply his parents.