Some call it love [NaNoWriMo13]

7 - Some call it love

I don't know what girls usually did when they started liking someone in a form of fancy, much rather than "I like you as a friend" kind of way due to my lack of friends of the female species, but what I did couldn't have been much different, right? I mean, if he lived opposite your house, you would hide behind the girly curtains of your actual room instead of your attic, right?

Since my curtains were fairly opaque, I figured that he wouldn't be able to see me staring at him from behind them, feeling my heart pound unhealthily from under my shirt. While I stole glances at Connor, he seemed to be looking out for me as well as he would usually gaze at my unusually empty attic window, just above the window of my own window. It made my heart beat thump by thump as I wondered whether he was looking out for me in the attic. 

But watching him without his knowledge felt so wrong. It felt so wrong knowing that he was actually expecting to see me up in my attic. I don't know, to me it felt so wrong that I was watching him, unbeknownst to him. 

I guess stalking felt weird to me. I never really made it a habit of mine to go around watching other while they were unaware, although it was pretty easy for me to do so in school, because nobody thought twice about me. They would look at me, probably make some snide remark about my hair, and then go back to whatever they were doing before they saw me. It was pretty common when things like that happened in my school. And I actually seemed to have good hearing, or I was an excellent lip reader, because I always seemed to know whatever it was that they were saying about me. It was not very nice. 

Nevertheless, I could very easily watch someone whether in a crowd or in a nearly-empty place, because I always seemed to be able to fade into the background. I guess at about now, I was grateful for my ability or gift. Well, maybe if I had foresight, that would be great too. As I was thinking, I noticed Connor's gaze lower even further. I immediately ducked to the side, hoping that he wouldn't notice that the curtains were moving indoors, with no source of wind in the room. After five minutes when I took a risk and peeked out of the window, I saw that he was walking down the street with Spots. I sighed in relief. I had gotten away with it this time. 

Or have I? 

Ten minutes later, Connor was jogging down the sidewalk as he brought Spots back in. I sighed in satisfaction as I watched him take the dog in, closing the door behind him. I was such a girl! I thought my little stunt had went unnoticed, but ten minutes later, after I thought he was at home, presumably having a bath after walking his dog. How wrong could I be?

As I climbed up to the attic, celebrating my achievement in terms of spying on Connor, I considered myself pretty successful. I mean, I did it all the time, but spying on Connor made me feel like the king of the world. I skimmed trough the books on my bookshelf and decided on one of my favourite books and then I settled by my usual corner by the attic window. It was a lovely spot. I flipped the book open to the first page. 

I was trying to get myself to focus on the book, but all my mind could concentrate on was back on Saturday, where I had watched Connor all sweaty and looking absolutely - well - hot. 

I guess it was pretty literal too. 

I'm such a joke. I even make myself laugh! 

I smiled at the memory, and I was starting to go into a fantasy when the doorbell rang, snapping me out of my thoughts. It couldn't really have been Terence because he knew that there was a set of keys above the doorframe. As I peered down of the attic window to see who it was, my heart skipped a beat. What was Connor doing ringing the doorbell?

I heard as mum quickly rushed towards the door, where she looked rather surprised to see Connor. I watched them have a quiet conversation when she invited him in. I didn't know why he couldn't wait for Terrence. Everyone knew that he would be coming back from his date later, when his plan to get with his girlfriend for their first year anniversary was practically announced to the whole school. Yeah, I wasn't really proud to be associated with him when it as announced.