Voldemort's Death Eater

15) Back To School

The next month I spent locked in my room, sometimes thinking about Harry, sometimes about Draco. I didn’t even think about school until there were only a few days left of the holidays.

     Draco continued to send me letters, sometimes sending two in one day with different owls. While his letters piled up, I sat and watched Hedwig sleep or clean herself. I decided to let her out to fly a few times and I was glad to see she didn’t fly too far or go back to Harry. I was pretty sure Harry still thought she was dead and I didn’t even think to mention to him that she was still alive when I crashed the Weasley’s wedding.

     The thought of sending Harry a letter along with his owl crossed my mind but I knew that would have been a stupid thing to do. But I knew I couldn’t keep Hedwig from him forever.

     I didn’t even know where Harry was. After seeing him in the café a month ago when Death Eaters snuck in after them, I knew he could have been anywhere! It made me feel sick not knowing if Harry was dead or alive. Although The Dark Lord hadn’t called for me since before the wedding, that gave me some comfort to the theory of Harry being alive.

     The day finally came to pack my things for Hogwarts and get onto Platform 9 ¾ to board the Hogwarts Express. Despite it being the holidays, I didn’t feel like I had wound down and relaxed. Although I had a lot of free time to myself, I couldn’t make myself spend it like I should have been. And the fact that I had gone to my actual home with my parents, it felt strange and foreign to me, even though I had spent my infant years there.

     As I ran through the barrier to Platform 9 ¾, I took my time in finding the right carriage I wanted before pushing my luggage on board. I settled everything in for the ride and found an empty compartment, thanking the Lord I was alone. But this was the Hogwarts express and people have a way of finding you.

     Only two people helped themselves to seats in my carriage but they weren’t there for long. A single pale face appeared before opening the door to let themselves in.

     ‘Leave,’ they said in a cold voice. ‘Now,’

     The two students got up and left reluctantly but I stayed where I was, staring out at the window as The Hogwarts Express started to move. Couples waved to their children, knowing they wouldn’t see them again for a long time, and I kind of wished that my parents were there to wave to me. But I didn’t wake them up that morning. I was used to getting to the station without an adult, even when it was just Draco and me.

     ‘It was weird walking to the station alone,’ Draco spoke up before closing the door and sitting down across from me. ‘I’ve missed you,’

     ‘I know,’ I said, keeping my gaze at the window. ‘I’ve read it a hundred times,’

     ‘Well, it’s true,’ Draco sounded really sad and it made me feel guilty. ‘Why didn’t you reply to any of my letters?’

     I took in a deep breath before answering. ‘I had nothing to say.’

     Draco got up and sat next to me, scooted a little closer and stared. I had never expected the relationship between Draco and me to become anything more than friends. In my opinion, we were like siblings but I guess I knew he always wanted to be more.

     And as we sat together, I never expected Draco to make me so nervous. He took my hand in his and squeezed softly. I could help but smile at his touch, turn my hand around and squeeze back. It felt kind of relieving to finally hold Draco’s hand. I liked it.

     ‘Again, I’m sorry,’ I found myself saying to him. ‘I just don’t want to ruin the relationship we’ve had since we were little,’