I never thought much about how my life would end. I thought about becoming an old grandmother with little grandchildren running around on Christmas day with their gifts , and joy filling the cold atmosphere-cold , that's all i could feel now . The cold surroundings grabbed onto my finger tips and toes as it travelled precariously up my limbs then into my centre , my heart beat slowing down - that's all i could hear , the distant sound of beating drums. As i counted each heart beat in the blackness of my surroundings i realized the slow pace they were taking were becoming slower and more distant. I was calling subconsciously on them to come back but they were getting further and further away from me, ignoring my call.
Was I dying ?
I could feel nothing but everything. Every sense closed but i could still feel my surroundings. Is this what its like to die- confusing but reassuring. I could feel my heavy head from impact but felt complete serenity as I layed out stretched on the pavement but struggled to move - I was like glue. I could feel my blood flowing through my veins become ever so cold , like an icy lake swimming through my body. My breathing was becoming ever so shallow like there was little at all. My skin felt cold , as cold as the lake flowing underneath it , i felt as though i could shiver but something was stopping me , it was myself.
I could hear Jays voice mixing with my beat as though he was singing to the drum. I could hear , smell and sense his pain and anger as i drifted into my never ending sleep of complete peace.I could hear the pain in his voice take over the sound, I could see him in my future , marrying me , being the father of my impossible children . I could see our fights , I could feel his love, I could feel his heartbreak. I didnt want to loose him. I would miss his deep blue eyes penetrating my greeny ones so innocently with despair and it would be all my fault.
I could see it now , the light they always talk about and i felt myself floating , was i flying? It felt like i was leaving something behind , something important. Maybe thats the sacrifice god makes us give up-maybe we give our bodies to him so we can carry on forward. Was this how it was supposed to end , me I mean ? Was he going to let me die this young without a taste of what life really means .
No
I will not and can not give up that easy , for Jay's sake and for most importantly my family's sake- What about my brother who will look after him if something happend to mum or dad , what about the person on the end of that call , they need me. I need to fight - liturately- for my life so save them and Jay.
All of a sudden i heard screaming and shouting coming from Jay . It was getting ever so distant Just like the beat of the drums . I started to feel dizzy and sick , I though my passing was supposed to be harmless ?
Suddenly i felt the warm moist-ness on my lips as air was pumped into my air-less lungs. The heat started to radiate through my lifeless corpse , each heart beat cascaded into thunder and i could feel myself come back almost like gravity pulling me down. I could feel the cold air hit my warming body as the gusty wind blew through the trees and onto my body like i was returned . My head felt heavy ,I could feel the pain radiate from my temples and the pool of blood conditioned my hair. I raised from the rocky floor and kissed those lips i have been longing forever. It was so smooth and simple but so over-powering too . I could feel the passion behind those lips as our feelings mixed.
I slowly opened my eyes and the light penetrated them , almost blinding me causing me to shut them again . my hand travelled up his back to the locks of his hair as i deepened the kiss. H e held me tight to his firm body and hugged me like never before sending shiver's up my every hair and impulsing my nerves.
i attempted to open my eyes again and the light wasn't as bad this time.
" Aria........What are you doing?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" said Jay from behind the person i was kissing
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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG YOU WEREN'T EXPECTING THAT WERE YOU , I AM EVIL AREN'T I ?
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X <3 NONI
