The City of Lost Hope

Chapter 11

Jace

I walked around my room, throwing things about. Where are they? The letters. All the letters addressed to Clary. They were never meant to be sent. Especially my most recent one.

It was a lie. IT WAS A LIE GODDAMMIT! I growl in frustration and swing open the door. Standing on the opposite side is Sebastian. 

"Hello little brother. Looking for something?"

Immediately, I knew.

He sent the letters to Clary. He sent them.

He sent them.

Clary

After taking care of Sebastian, I rush back to the safety of the room. I know that he'll come back but I wanted peace before I had to help him again. 

I quietly close the door and look down at my stomach. It's not as defined as most women would see but I can tell there's a change. The baby growing inside me disgusts me so much... Yet I can't get an abortion. Just the thought of killing an innocent child that has no idea of how it was conceived disgusts me. I couldn't do that. Yet I know that the child will feel my disgust every time I look at it. I'm hoping that I'll love this child or else I won't have anything here in this desolate land.

A knock resounds in the room and I quickly shoot up and pull open the door. Amatis stands there holding a tray. She shoves it into my hands and sneers at me. "From Sebastian, your Highness," she spits out. 

"Thank you Amatis. You are dismissed," I state calmly. After she walks down the hall I shut the door and place the tray on the bed. I sit down and stare at the tray for a couple minutes, wondering what could be in there. I pull open the tray's lid and see letters all addressed to me. I pick one up and open it with the letter opener next to it. 

What's written on the page makes me drop the letter opener and cover my mouth.

These letters aren't from Sebastian...

They're from Jace.

Dear Clary,

I heard you today. I heard your voice as you went to relieve Sebastian of his sexual frustrations. 

I heard it. I HEARD IT. 

And it won't go away. Just make it go away. MAKE IT STOP.

Jace

...

Dear Clary,

I haven't seen you in so long yet I feel you and see you.

I'm losing my mind because of you... Yet I can't blame you. Never can I blame you.

Jace

...

Dear Clary,

I think it's time that I've moved on.

It's not your fault nor is it mine. It's simply the way to survive. Everyone has someone and here I am... Alone. I think that now's the time to leave it all behind. We'll never see each other again.

But one last time...

I love you Clary.

Jace