Dreams are meant to be dreamt and made to go after. Unfortunately for Audrey Carter, that concept never really stuck. How do you go after something that you lost a long time ago?
Audrey met Tom a while back. Their encounter sparked something between...
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He hadn't spoken to me all day. Since last night. Usually he would be mad for a while when he didn't get his way, and then he'd forget about the ordeal and talk to me again. He'd usually only be angry for a solid hour.
It's been a day.
I didn't think he'd hold his grudge this long. And frankly, I don't know why I thought he wouldn't. I really underestimated his seriousness when he told me "You always say no, mommy."
I didn't think I said no a lot until he said that. Until I heard the words come out so hateful and blunt. I think it was the shock that my seven year old was saying it to me. I think that's what it was to make me actually believe his words. After all, he's around me the most. He knows what I say more than anyone.
I really do say 'no' a lot.
Mostly because it's easier that way. It always has been. I guess I had gotten in the habit of 'no'.
It's even worse that Evan had to be the one to make me see that.
He sat on the couch as I got ready. He was watching some TV show. He was all dressed and ready to go. Except, his shoes weren't on.
Did I dare ask?
"Evan. Could you put your shoes on? We're leaving in a minute." I asked him slowly. Afraid that he was going to give me some kind of back talk. If he did, I would only blame myself. Because he most likely got that trait from me.
The reflex. Remember?
"Yes." He said. To my surprise. He got up off the couch and turned the TV off. He walked over to the place where his shoes were and sat down on the floor to put them on.
That was the first word he had said to me since last night, when he gave me his idea.
He had a well thought out plan for his project.
The project is about giving. So he thought the hospital was the perfect place to do that exact thing. He thought of the idea to help to patients by saying socializing with the kids, and spending time with them during the day. He even thought of giving each patient little gifts on Christmas. Affordable yet thoughtful.
The idea was brilliant and beyond generous. I loved it.
Until he went into detail.
"So this way, Loki can help me!"
I don't think I've ever said 'no' faster. As if the name he associated Tom with was a button. He pressed it and I shot his idea down as fast as I could. I honestly don't think he could finish his sentence.
He argued with me for a good five minutes. Until I finally raised my voice. Telling him that my decision was final and that Loki could not help him.
I made up the excuse that Loki had his own things to do. Which wasn't exactly a lie. He's an actor, and now a volunteer at a hospital. I'm sure he didn't have much time or patience to deal with my child for the majority of his time while he was already spending time with three-hundred adolescent patients a day.
