One Shots

Her

    

In our life, we'll make note of a lot of people. Ones with whom we shared something special, ones who will always mean something.

There's the one you first kissed, the one you first loved, the one you put on a pedestal, the one you're with... and the one you wish you're with.

***

I met a girl in high school. Her face was the most beautiful face I have ever seen. Her hair, black as the night sky, swayed gracefully as she walked in campus.

From the moment I saw her I knew I liked her.

I was thirteen, puppy love, they said. The kind that easily fades away.

We were in first year when I first wrote her a letter. And in that same year I stole a kiss. She was my first kiss. I was her first kiss too.

Up to now the memory of that kiss lingers vividly in my mind.

Years passed, I still wrote her letters and she answered some of it. It was enough for me. I knew it was unrequited love, sad, but at the same time I was contented that I loved her.

In 3rd year of our high school some of my friends teased me to move on. They introduced me to some of their friends so I met other girls and I'd been in a number of short relationships.

But those short relationships didn't work at all. I never loved them. I kept coming back to her. I found solitude in loving her.

On our senior year, unexpected happened. She learned to love me too; it was no longer unrequited love. I was the happiest man alive when I learned about it. But there was one glitch – she was committed to another.

"It's ok" I desperately told myself. In four years being in love with her it is finally reciprocated. I courted her, we dated secretly. I loved her more than just a puppy love. But after sometime I felt guilty. It was unfair. I pitied the other guy, I thought I wouldn't want my girl to be snatched by another guy.

I made the most hard decision – I stopped. And this is one decision I will regret for the rest of my life. One of the biggest mistakes I have ever made.

We parted ways after graduation. I went to college and I was welcomed into a bigger world but we still communicated from time to time. I had a couple of relationships but none lasted for more than a few months just like before.

Time came that we lost communications and I gave my heart a rest for committing to another relationship, there were times that I still thought about her.

Sometimes I think that maybe I'm just holding onto a dead feeling. I might just be in love with the memories and not her. Maybe I no longer love her or maybe I still love her. That I am not sure.

As the years passed we have re-established communication, I found out that she is still committed to that lucky guy whom I pitied before.

"But they are not married yet."

All the while I was believing that we were destined for each other. I lived in the illusion that we will have our own and-they-lived- happily-ever- after ending. I lived in a dream that we will spend the rest of our lives together.