My Best Friend is Back

Chapter 3- Box of Memories

Chapter 3- Box of Memories

"You're wearing that?" Madison asked raising an eyebrow to my attire.

Ok I know it's not exactly ideal but Aiden loved this shirt. In fact it was his. He had loaned it to me one night when I stayed over at his and I just happened to forget to give it back. It was my favorite too. The only difference was Aiden loved it due to it supporting his favorite football team, while I loved it because it was his.

I slept in it almost every night for a month after he left me. I think it was just part of the healing process. And still is. I do still use it just not as much.

"Yeah, so what." I shrugged looking for my other shoe. No doubt it somehow ended up under the bed again. That always seems to be where they are when they go missing.

"You know what." She says giving me that flat look like she normally does when she's trying to be serious.

I sighed already knowing where this was heading. And perhaps she's right but I just refuse to believe it.

"Looks Madds. I'm fine, okay? I'm not going to become so dependent on him again. You don't have to worry about me."

Even as I said the words I still didn't believe them. I think I was trying to convince myself more than I was her. Maybe I need to journal this. I often realize a lot of things that way. It's my time to reflect.

"Fine, if you want to set yourself up to get hurt again then I can't stop you. Just be careful."

That's right. She knew everything. Last night after many, many, bowls of ice cream I finally broke down and told her everything about my old life with Aiden. All the work I had done to keep those parts of my lives separate was now wasted.

Everything I had tried so hard to forget was now coming back in heaps and my emotions were running wild. I had no idea what I was supposed to do or how I was to act. I was so confused.

Will he act like everything nothing has changed? Will he like the new me? Will we go back to the way things used to be?

No. No I can't. I can't rely on him again. What if he leaves me like he did last time? I can't allow myself to get hurt again. I needed him too much.

All these questions were driving me mad and I couldn't think of anything else.

"Are you alright?" Madison asked after my long silence. "You kind of zoned out for a minute."

"Yeah." I nodded. "Just nerves."

I took in a deep breath and looked at myself in the mirror. In the eyes of the girl staring back at me I saw who I used to be. Or maybe it's the girl I am. Maybe I didn't really change. Maybe I've been this girl all along and my exterior has been the only thing to change.

The only thing that was different was my pain. It wasn't there anymore and I was much more independent than when he left. I don't plan of letting that go anytime soon.

"Maybe your right." I said looking at her next to me in the mirror. "I think I will change."

Even though she didn't say I could tell she was happy by more choice to go with the outfit she had chosen for me. However, I was slightly nervous because she wore things much more revealing than me. I mean I didn't care to show some skin but Maddie was an entirely different example.

I don't mean to say she dresses like a slut though. She wore it tastefully but I couldn't pull it off as well as her. For one, I was lacking in the front what she wasn't and two; my legs were nowhere near as long as hers.