Chapter 11 - Ana

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Ana watches Diane wrap yarn around a plastic circle with points at the top.

"Watch, Ana. Use the needle to lift the bottom yarn over the top. Go all the way around the circle and before you know it, you'll have a hat," Diane says.

Ana takes the yarn in her hands.  It's soft and she likes how it fades from blue to grey and back to blue.  She hooks the yarn over like Diane shows her.  Her loop is saggy and doesn't look as good as Diane's.  Normally, Ana would just give the whole project back to Diane.  It is tedious and boring and she doesn't even like wearing hats. But Ana humors Diane because she can hear her parents talking to Maria in the staff room. 

"You must ensure that Ana is safe," Ana's mom says.  "That's your job.  How could your clients have gotten the keys to a van not once, but twice! And why was your first instinct to call the police rather than go after them yourself?"

There is a muffled sound as Maria responds in a slow, calm voice that is difficult to hear through the closed door.

"Yes, I understand you're trying.  I appreciate that, but Ana is my daughter and I want to know you can keep her safe.  You might not have found her for days if she hadn't gone to Evan's!"

There are more muffled sounds as Maria responds.

"Look.  I know what happened. You don't have to retell the story.  I read about it in the newspaper for God's sake!  I should have been called immediately when she was discovered missing.  Which brings me to my next question: Why did it take so long before you knew Ana was missing?"

Someone is pacing in the staff room, a window opens, and again Maria's response is muffled.

"I don't care about any God damn investigations! I am her mother and I want answers now!  I want to know what you have found out.  I want details of the day Ana took the van and details about the most recent incidence that she wasn't involved in." 

Ana's mother's voice rings out again, even louder, "Yes she's in care, but we are still her parents and WE WILL ADVOCATE FOR HER!  Let me make myself clear, here.  If you do not share your information, I will seek legal help and we will go to the papers!"

Something slams on the desk and there is quiet for a few seconds.  Ana twists the yarn around the plastic prongs.  Diane is listening as well.

"Maybe Ana wants to live on her own," Ana's father says.  His voice is low and steady. He must be standing close to the door.

"Really?" Maria says loud enough for Ana to hear.  "You really think that's an option?"

"I don't know,"  Ana's father replies.  "I'm just wondering if that's what she wants."

Go Dad!  Ana thinks.    

"Be realistic, Simon," Ana's mother says.  "She's not going to live with other people who have disabilities.  People she hardly knows.  And she's especially not living with men!  That's not an option.  We have to keep her safe."

"She's an adult," Ana's father says.

"She can't make those types of decisions."

"Can't she?"

The door opens.  Maria is standing in the door way.  "If you're finished looking through the notes I have, we'll end this meeting but I'll call you and keep you posted as I learn more.  As you can see, I really don't have very much information to share with you."

Diane picks up the knitting bag and is putting the yarn in it when Ana's parents come into the living room.

"Are you leaving already? I was just tidying up to take Ana out," Diane says.

"No need to," Ana's father says.  "Nice to see you again, Diane."

Ana sees that her Dad's mouth is closed tight. He looks angry.  He barely looks at Ana as he leaves which is strange because usually he makes a good effort to focus a lot of his attention on her.  Ana's mom gives Ana a quick hug and kiss before she leaves.

Maria pulls a chair over to where Ana is sitting and sits down facing Ana.

"Diane, if you want to do some house chores, I'd like to chat with Ana for a few minutes," Maria says.

"Oh, I'll stay and help.  It's hard to understand what Ana is trying to say sometimes," Diane replies.

"I'm well aware of how Ana communicates, Diane.  We'll be fine."

"Well, if you're sure," Diane says hesitantly.

"Absolutely sure.  I don't want your help."

Maria turns to Ana.

"Ana, look at me."

Ana faces her.  Maria's face has tiny creases around her mouth and eyes.  She looks old.  A lot older than she had a few days ago.  The energy coming off her feels tense and sick.  One push, Ana thinks, and Maria would probably fall out of her chair.  Ana clasps her hands together tightly in her lap.

"Remember when you drove the van?"  Maria asks.

Ana looks out the window.  It is hard to look at Maria for more than a few seconds. 

"Look at me, Ana.  You can't leave like that.  It's dangerous.  You could have gotten hurt."

But I didn't, Ana thought. 

"Ana, I know you understand what I'm saying.  I know you are the one who wants to leave and the others are just following you.  This has to stop, now.  Now!  Do you understand?" Maria pulls on Ana's chin so Ana is facing her again.

Ana notices that Maria has several moles along her chin and one just below her eye.  The tension radiating off Maria makes Ana feel dizzy.

"I said, do you understand?!" 

Of course I understand! Ana thinks.  And you just said you knew I understood.  Ana gazes at a spot just above Maria's head.  She stares at it until her eyes begin to lose focus.  She lets herself rock ever so slightly.  Abruptly, she leans forward and looks straight into Maria's eyes.  For a brief moment, Ana sees uncertainty and fear in Maria's tired eyes.  Maria is just making guesses about Ana. 

Ana sits back.  "Hieee," she says.  Almost playfully, Ana shakes her clasped hands towards Maria.  

"You little bitch," Maria whispers very softly, so softly Ana barely hears her.

Diane comes into the room with a cup of coffee for Maria. 

"Haaat," Ana says lifting the knitting bag and smiling at Diane.

"Yes, dear," Diane says.  "We're making a beautiful blue hat for you to wear next winter.  Did you show Maria?"  

"I'm just leaving." Maria glances at Ana and back to Diane.  "Remember, the car keys must stay on the wrist band and only take it off when you give the wristband to the next staff person at shift change.  We need to work together to keep Ana ... safe."  When she says safe, Maria turns to Ana and smiles.  

Bring it on, lady!  Ana thinks.  I'm so ready for you.

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