Rules of Escape

Chapter 3 - Ana

As Carli drives away, Evan's voice fades. Don't resist, he repeats.

Ana clings to Evan's voice as it grows fainter. It isn't just his advice that she needs - it is the soft understanding of his voice that wraps around her, a blanket of hope and calm. When she can no longer hear the sound of his voice, Ana returns to her solitary world. But this time, it is worse, much worse. In the void where his voice had been, her body grows hot with rage.

"I can't believe you did that Ana! You have no idea how much shit I'm in!" Carli yells from the front seat. "I'm lucky to even have a job, still. And it's all your fault! Never again, I tell you. I'll do everything in my power to make sure I keep this job. I tried so hard to do things you'd enjoy. No more! That's it. You've lost your freedom for good, this time, Missy." Carli glances in the rear view mirror at Ana. "Yeah, you look out that window and drool. You have no idea how good you've got it. You don't have to do a thing. No responsibilities. No worries. You have it so good - you have no idea what life's really like."

Ana slips off her runners with her feet and reaches down to pick them up. While Carli looks ahead, Ana aims one shoe at the back of Carli's head. Ana's aim is perfect and her shoe takes Carli completely by surprise. The second shoe is ready in Ana's hand when Carli turns in surprise. The second shoe hits Carli square in the face.

"What the hell!" Carli yells as she pulls over to the side of the road. She leans between the two front seats, towards Ana, her eyes red and teary. "You have to stop that! You'll cause an accident!"

Ana grabs Carli's hair with both hands and pulls Carli's head down towards the floor of the car. Carli struggles and swears. She pinches Ana's hands and punches at Ana. Ana looks out the car window, up at the clouds, and screams. Stop talking, Carli. Please. Just let me be, Ana thinks.

Carli bites Ana's leg. Instinctively, Ana pushes Carli's head away and Carli pulls herself back into the front seat only to reappear at Ana's passenger door with duct tape in her hands. Ana feels her hands being duct taped together. Her feet are duct taped together, as well. Then her body is duct-taped to her seat. She could fight Carli off, but instead, she continues to scream. No one has ever used duct tape on Ana before. By the time Ana realizes just how confined she actually is, it is too late to fight.

"Shut up!" Carli yells. "Stop that awful noise! Jesus Christ! I don't get paid enough for this shit! Hold still! We're going home and you're not going to move an inch!" Carli wraps the last bit of tape tight against Ana's chest.

Carli starts the car and begins driving again. Ana stops screaming. She needs to take deep breaths to be able to scream and the duct tape restricts her breathing. She stares out the window, watching the clouds. She takes small, shallow breaths and slows her breathing. The clouds outside are mesmerizing.

Sunlight shines through the clouds in long shimmering waves. The rays of light seem to vibrate with the buzz of a million bees. Each ray sparkles, a kaleidoscope of colours. Ana feels herself leave the car. Floating on the sun's rays, miles above the earth, she slips along on rays of light towards the hum that merges into music. She closes her eyes.

When Ana opens her eyes, she is looking directly into the light bulb of her bedside table lamp. She stares into the light bulb, lets the heat burn into her head. She can see other things in the light - the inside of the light bulb, heat waves, and various shades of brightness. The bulb is not all one thickness. Different parts of the bulb shine with varying intensities depending on the thickness. She smells the heat. Sees the electricity.

Someone is talking. Ana tries to get up but hands push Ana back so she is lying down again. Her body feels heavy and, as she is moved away from the light, her eyes can't adjust. Her head spins. Her arms collapse beneath her each time she tries to push herself up. She feels herself sliding. Sliding up or down? She can't tell. Maybe, she isn't moving at all. This feeling will pass, Ana thinks as she recognizes the slow, thick feeling of being drugged.

Ana tries to ask for a drink but her mouth is so dry, her tongue feels like a thick ball of paper towel. As her eyes adjust, she realizes the lights in her room have been turned off. Sensing someone standing near her, she clumsily swings her arm but hits nothing. Is the person real? Is it even a person? Why is it hovering over her? Ana tries to fight it, but she has no energy and she is trapped in a body she has no control over.

She remembers swallowing pills. Those little pills are given to Ana when she is least able to refuse them. She had lost control and, like every other time, she hadn't resisted the pills. But the water she had been given with the pills had been ice cold. So good. She wants some of that water, now.

Memories of rage flicker through her mind. Why had she been so angry? She had wanted something. What was it? It had been important. She had become angry. She had hurt someone. Where had she been? What had she done? She had felt the rage - it had taken over her mind completely.

The ceiling begins to ripple, like waves at the beach. Her memory of the light bulb becomes the setting sun. Ana closes her eyes, just for a moment, to stop the spinning and an increasing humming noise. She feels herself sink again into inescapable, murky darkness. She doesn't resist. Can't resist. Resist, who had said that word? As she sinks again into the dark mud of her mind, she pictures Evan and remembers everything.