Kissing In Cars

9

The next morning I'm in my office where I should be doing paperwork, but instead I'm distracted by my phone. For the past five minutes I've been staring at my phone, rereading the text Tony sent me last night.

I'm sorry, you won't hear from me again

It's the same thing he texted me when we broke up. Or, technically when he broke up with me. 

I remember it like it just happened. His band had just got their official big break into the scene. They were staring their first tour, and it was already sold out. They were a huge deal. Tony was getting recognized when he went out which of course made him feel super shy in the moment, but it was clear how much he loved it.

Tony and I had been living together for almost three years at that point, so I laid on our bed that night as he packed his things. He kept talking excitedly about the tour, going over the setlist and where their first show is. He kept telling me which venues were close to me so I could come see him play. He radiated as he talked about the tour, going on and on about it. I had never been happier for him.

The next morning was hard when he left. The tour was four months which didn't seem like that long when he first told me but now that it was here it felt like forever.

"I'll be back before you know it." Tony said to me, his face a mix of excitement and sorrow. 

"I know." I said, trying my hardest not to cry. I vowed to myself that I would only cry once he was gone so that he didn't have to see me breakdown. He was so excited, and I had to be strong for him, show him I was excited for him to have his dream in front of him. 

"I'll call you every night." Tony promised me. He wrapped his arms around me and kissed my forehead softly, his lips lingering longer than usual. "I gotta go." he whispered into my hair.

I nodded, my throat feeling scratchy and sore. 

"Hey." he said softly to me. His hand turned my head so I could look up into his eyes. "Four months isn't that long."

"You're right." I said, trying to convince myself. "You're going to be great. Have fun, don't forget how much I love you."

"I could never forget." he said and pressed another kiss to my forehead. "I love you so much."

And like that he was off for his first tour. I cried like a goddamn baby as soon as he left, but I knew that deep down he was right, four months isn't that long. 

For the first couple of days he called me every night like he promised. Most of the time he was at a bar or a party and had stepped out to call me. Eventually he stopped calling every day and called every other day. After a month the calls got more and more spread out until eventually, I didn't hear from him for two days. I panicked and called him often, but I didn't get any replies. I called his mom and she said he had been replying slower to her too, so I thought nothing of it and chalked it up to him being busy.

Finally, after not hearing from Tony for two days he texted me. I ran to my phone to check it excited to see how his first tour was going and what he's been up to. As I read the text, my heart sinks.

I don't think we should be together anymore. It doesn't feel right to travel and have you at home. I'm sorry, you won't hear from me again.

I tried calling him, but it went right to voicemail. My texts wouldn't go through, and I couldn't find any of his social medias anymore. He had broken up with me over text then blocked me from his entire life. 

 The very next day I moved out of "our" place, leaving his stuff behind for when he returned. I left all my memories of him at that apartment along with a big part of my heart.