⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚ To live for the hope of it all ˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚fourteen˚୨୧⋆｡˚ ⋆

Ella's pov:

"Rise and shineee!" Taylor voice says while opening my curtains, way too excited for this time in the morning. "Can't sleep just be my therapy?" I ask, rolling onto my stomach and pressing my head into my pillow to block out the light. "Nope now up you get it's already 10:30. We can't be late today El." She tells me, pulling the covers off of me. I groan at her before sitting up. "I brought you some breakfast!" Taylor tells me, grabbing the plate of french toast and fruit off of the vanity where she had placed them for a moment. "I'm not that hungry this morning, I'm not sure how much of it I will eat." I say, taking the plate off of her. "Make sure you have something, you need lots of energy for today." She tells me before blowing a kiss and walking out of my room. "Please don't go back to sleep." She laughs and closes the door behind her.

Once the door has closed, the smile on my face faded as I looked down at the food infront of me. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴. I pulled myself out of bed and decided to just get ready and act as though eating wasn't an option. I went into my closet to pick out and outfit for today, settling on my white fox hoodie and a pair of flare leggings. I pulled them off their hangers and placed them on my bed to get changed into after I had a shower. 

I walked to the bathroom, turned on my music and jumped into the shower, taking my time as I wanted less time to be forced to eat. The water stung against my arms, but not as much as usual and I really had to fight my brain to not hurt myself then and there, my excuse being the therapist may ask to see my arms. After a long hour in the shower, I jumped out and got changed in my room before sitting down at my vanity. I pulled out my hairdryer and dried my hair as I didn't want to go to the appointment with soaking wet hair. It was already 12:15 when I finished, meaning I still had under two hours where I had to look busy so Taylor didn't pester me to eat. I slowly did my makeup, taking extra time 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘴.

★

I had already spent 15 extra minutes on my makeup then usual as I enjoyed the music I had playing while I did everything. A knock on my door was followed by Taylor walking into my room while quietly singing the lyric to sweet nothing, her own song, as she came towards me. "Someone is ready early for once." She says, playfully rolling her eyes and smiling. "Yeah, I just decided to get ready and get it out of the way." I shrug, placing my beauty blender down and looking at Taylor who's smile slowly faded off her face. "Uh. Are you okay Taylor?" I ask, confused to where her happy and smiley face had gone. "Are 𝘺𝘰𝘶 okay Ella? I know you said you weren't hungry but you have touched any of your food." She says, concerned. "Yeah I'm fine, I'm just nervous you know." I say, making up a lie on the spot. "Just eat a bit of it El, please. Is there anything you want to talk about?" She begs, still with a concerned look in her eyes. "I'm fine Tay! How many times do I have to tell you for you to believe me?" I defensively say back. "I'll believe you when you mean it." She says before walking out of my room and taking the plate of food with her. 

I stared at the ground where Taylor once stood, stunned by her words before she shortly came back with a granola bar. "Just have this please." She says, her voice soft rather than concerned and firm like before. I looked at the bar she had passed me, unfamiliar with the brand, 𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦 𝘯𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳. I looked at the bar, then back at Taylor who was watching me intensely. I opened the wrapper and took a small bite, "See I'm fine!" I tell her after swallowing the food in my mouth. "Finish it off for me please." Taylor said softly however still being assertive. It took a little while but I finished the whole bar and a smile once again appears on Taylors face. She gave me a kiss on the forehead and walked out of my room. Once I saw the door shut, I flipped the packaging over and straightened it out, desperately looking for a calorie number. "197 calories." I mutter my myself, reading the label aloud. 𝘚𝘩𝘪𝘵. 𝘈 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 197 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴?! I threw the packaging down and stood from my vanity, rushing myself into the bathroom.