May saltik yata sa utak ang kapatid ko ngayon. Naka-sakay lang ng eroplano, na-high na. Paanong magiging Diana ang Dian? Siguro'y may multiple personality disorder si Dian. Eto kaya ang resulta noong nahulog siya sa swing noong kabataan namin?
Me: Dian. Walang "A"!
Diana: Sige, tanggalin ang "A". "Din" na lang ang pangalan ko ngayon.
Me: Adik ka ba? Anak ka nga ng tatay mo.
Diana: Ayaw mo talagang maniwalang si Diana ako?
Me: Baby, dalawa lang tayo.
Diana: Mijn naam is Diana. Ik ben je oudste zus. Ik ben 18 minuten ouder dan Dian. U bent onze jongste broer. Onze moeder en vader scheidden zich van elkaar toen we geboren werden. Ingewikkelde situatie. Ik ga de hele tijd seks met jou en papa hebben totdat ik naar huis moet. Ik ga al je sperma slikken. Ik laat je al mijn gaten in de gaten houden.Ik ga de hele tijd seks met jou en papa hebben totdat ik naar huis moet. Ik ga al je sperma slikken. Ik zal je al mijn gaten laten betreden.
Ampepe. Nag-orasyon bigla!
Me: Wait! Wait! That's Dutch!
Diana: Yes, it is! Marunong bang mag-Dutch si Dian?
Me: Hindi gaano. Konti lang nalalaman namin.
Diana: So, naniniwala ka na?
Me: Ikaw ba yung nasa video?
Diana: Yes. With my Dutch bf. Pina-tanggal ko agad sa bf ko ang video nang malaman ko. Baka may nag-download lang kaya't meron silang copy.
Me: What the F? Hindi mo alam? Kailan ba ito nangyari?
Diana: Lil bro, my bf and I was drunk when he uploaded the video. Birthday ko. Ay! Natin pala hihihi.
Me: This year?
Diana: Yes, I am 18.
Me: Bakit ka marunong mag-Tagalog?
Diana: Hindi naman mahirap pag-aralan ang Tagalog. And besides, dad taught mom how to speak tagalog and mom taught me. Marami rin akong Fil-Ger na mga kaibigan. I liked Filipinos. They are hard, just like you.
Me: Hard?
Diana: Hard titi hihihi. Why is it so hard? It's big and it's hard? Why?
Me: Filipino pride?
Diana: Talking about patriotism.
Me: Bakit ka nag-tataka kung matigas. Isn't it supposed to be that way?
Diana: Oh! I saw a lot of huge penis, pero hindi ganyan katigas. Kaya nga mom and I love Filipino cocks kasi laging handa. Parang boy scout!
Me: When can I meet Mom?
Diana: You met her once.
Me: Really? When?
Diana: When you were ten. Sa isang beach. She never introduced herself to you and Dian. Just went there to take a good look at you.
Me: Bakit hindi ….
Diana: Oh! Shut up, little bro. Saka na tayo mag-usap. I'm not done yet.
Me: What done yet?
Diana: I haven't cum yet.
Me: Oh! Ah? Pasok na tayo sa loob?
Diana: No! Idiot. Dito sa car. Exciting di ba?
Me: Pero baka may dumaan. Madali tayong makikita.
Diana: That's the idea, IDIOT!
Me: No! Hindi ito Germany or Holland. Iba ang tingin ng mga tao dito sa sex.
