Where the Red Oak stood

Chapter 20

Chad stopped by the door and listened. He knew Ray would not be anywhere near and he was almost certain the sound he'd heard a moment ago was the girls going outside. They would not return to their room so soon, would they? And Frankie? He strained to hear. There were some noises coming from downstairs, but it was too distant to be from the kitchen. Which meant he should be able to sneak out through the front door unnoticed.

He opened the door and went out of the bedroom. Before he knew it he was outside, and indeed, no one noticed him. He swept his eyes across the property, but the girls were nowhere to be seen. They really have taken to keepin' to themselves. As much as it bothered him he could not help but feel relieved. We all keep to ourselves nowadays.

His first thought was the stable. He had not taken Lucy outside at all yesterday and it would be embarrassing if Frankie had to remind him again. It had taken him three full days from when he and Ray returned until he had been able to bring himself to even enter the stable, and if Frankie had not reminded him, he did not know when he would have gone to see his horse. But here was the thing: while he had been able to be honest around the Shackleford family before the mountains, he couldn't be that anymore. Too much had happened. He could not explain to Frankie the true reason for why he dreaded sitting on Lucy's back, because by rights, realizing how healthy she was should be nothing but a good thing. But to him it only meant countdown. Every day he was half expecting Ray to come and tell him he had to leave. Only we don't speak during the day. And considering how their nights were, he doubted Ray would ever find it in him to say anything of real importance. When he was not crying, he was pleading with Chad to not reveal anything to the others.

"We've already tried silence", Chad would try to tell him, even though he had long since realized it wasn't working. But that did not mean the others wouldn't soon start to wonder.

Chad opened the door to the stable, but he had not even reached Lucy's stall before he changed his mind. The guilt was too strong. I shouldn't be stayin' here at all.

Yet how could he leave?

He ended up by the red oak. It was looking more parched by the day, but its thick crown of leaves still provided an appreciated shadow. Chad sat down next to it, leaning his back against the trunk. Some ants were running up and down the roots and he spent some time watching them. Dedicated teamworkers. Ants never seemed to do anything but work. All knowin' their place and task. The Shackleford ranch may never have been his place, but before the mountains he had at least fitted here. Enjoyed it, and the family. Now every waking hour was a challenge.

The sun wandered across the sky and eventually Frankie called him and the girls inside for dinner. Ray had not dined with them since he and Chad returned. Chad went to sit, though, however little he enjoyed it.

Dinner passed under silence, as it had for so many days now. Mary and Emelie ate with their heads bent over their plates and left the kitchen as soon as they were finished. Chad also wanted to leave - being left with Frankie alone was worse still - so he shoveled the last of his portion into his mouth, rose and went to wash his plate.

But he was too late. "Do you have time a minute, Chad?" Frankie asked.

No, no, no! he wanted to scream.

"Um... I guess... yeah", he said.

"Good. Come." She gestured to the chair beside her, and filled with increasing dread, Chad went back to sit. He did not like the look of the wrinkle on her forehead. "I need to ask you something, Chad, and I will ask straight away because I have had enough of this." If she could look at him more directly, she did. "Did something happen between you and Ray in the mountains?"