-All Too Well-

21. 스물하나

Although Zhang Hao preferred to have breakfast at home, and most of the time Hanbin stayed there with him to help, that day, neither of them had the mood to cook first thing in the morning. So, like any lazy student would do, they decided to have breakfast at the cafeteria. Usually with Matthew, Hanbin chose to sit at one of the middle tables, but with Hao, he chose one at the corner, because Hao didn't like more people to gather around their table.

Hanbin bought them both light breakfast. They sat facing each other. Although both of them pretended as if everything was okay, they could still feel the thin wall of separation after their fight at the beach. It showed at how they barely talked while eating. Normally, they'd flirt around like there's no one else around. The silence distracted Hanbin many times. He would look around, see what others do. He saw both happy and sad faces. The excited ones of freshers and the overly stressed ones of senior students. He couldn't but sigh. The four years of university really takes a huge toll on students. Although Hanbin had two more to go, he could feel the heavy burden starting to fall over him.

Well, screw the academic life. His personal life was also in jeopardy. All because of his own stupidity.

As Hanbin glanced here and there, his eyes got stuck at the other corner, right across from them. At first, he saw the back of a certain guy, whom he didn't think of looking at twice, but even before his eyes moved, he got a glimpse of one sharp jaw hiding behind the frame of the taller guy. His heart flipped, because suddenly, he recognised both of them. He kept his gaze to confirm and yes, the two were none other than Matthew and Jiwoong.

The grip on his jaw tightened. He watched Jiwoong pulling a chair for Matthew to sit on. The younger had his back facing Hanbin, so he didn't know that someone was poking holes through the back of his head with his sharp stare.

But Hao did. As he saw that Hanbin had stopped eating, he looked up and traced where Hanbin's eyes rested at. He saw what his boyfriend saw. He too, felt the strong tug at his heart.

"Bin? You wanna sit here?" He showed an empty chair by his side, from where Hanbin would not be able to see Matthew without turning his head. Hanbin declined the offer though, saying that he was okay.

So they ate. More silently. The silence this time was uncomfortable. Hao looked at his man every now and then. Hanbin ate so fast that Hao feared he'd choke but luckily, the breakfast ended without an issue. Hao paced up as well, and they were both done soon.

Hanbin stood up first. Without even saying anything. Hao followed him. They walked all the way to the younger's department, barely talking. When Hanbin was about to say bye, Hao asked, "Hey, are you free tonight?"

"Maybe." Hanbin replied. Hao smiled, "Then come at my place."

"Okay." Hanbin replied shortly. His dry reply didn't satisfy Hao, but he accepted it anyway. He left after giving a short hug to his boyfriend. He really hoped that Hanbin would be alright, would be back to how he was before. Sweet, endearing, caring.

Hanbin, however, was far from that. He spent the entire morning in a bad mood. The classes were boring, his mind was all over the place. He lost attention so many times! What must he do? At one end, there was Zhang Hao, the guy he chose, the guy trying hard to make things work between them. He wanted that too. But every time he saw Matthew with Jiwoong, he tended to lose himself. Matthew's bright smile that once lit up his whole day seemed to hurt him at places. He couldn't take it that someone else was holding Matthew in his arms.

He thought hard, so hard whether it was because he genuinely disliked Jiwoong or not. The fact that Jiwoong's ex was his close friend, and he heard from the man how bluntly Jiwoong rejected him when he asked for a second chance- it all makes sense that he'd be protective over Matthew. But does it explain how furious he got upon seeing Matthew with Keita, almost side hugging each other during lunch?