This unicorn has never written a story before. Her name is Steve.
Hi.
My name is Steve.
I have to write a stupid chapter of a stupid book that stupid people have to read. I hate writing. I hate life. I don't want to write this. But I have to. Today when I got up I went to go eat some stones but another dirty unicorn had already eaten all the stones from the river, so I was just like. "DUDE WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME I HATE YOU I HATE LIFE!!" Oh, did I mention that the dirty horrible stupid stone stealing unicorn was still there? Anyway, he was just like "I DIDN'T MEAN TO SORRY CAN YOU FORGIVE ME NOW I WILL THROW THE STONES BACK UP FOR YOU BY THE WAY MY NAME IS SALLY" I was so happy I decided that I love him. I hoped he would marry me and then climb a tree with me and bite a squirrel while I went to cook dinner out of stones. So I was just like "OMG SORRY LOL I LOVE LIFE NOW I LOVE YOU CAN YOU MARRY ME AND THEN CLIMB A TREE WITH ME AND BITE A SQUIRREL WHILE COOKING DINNER OUT OF STONES" But then he ran away. I spent the rest of the day eating stones, then the snake on my head bead to bug me so I squashed it against a tree. Then I decided life was pointless so I went to fall off a cliff but then I remembered that unicorns are anti-gravity so I didn't. On the way I stepped on a turtle. The snake on my head healed again so I was unhappy. Oh apparently it will be too boring if I keep writing like this and now I only need to finish that day so I'm just like so happy now. Okay so when the sun went down I waited for the full moon to come up and kicked a werewolf in the nuts then kissed him. Then that night I fell asleep in a tree. Oh apparently I have to explain what the snake on my head is. It's like that stupid horn people say we have, which I wish we have, except it's a snake. Mine is pink. Anyway I had a dream about a cat eating a cheeseburger, then I was hungry so I was like stuff this i'm gonna go eat some stones. So I drifted down to somestones and then fell asleep floating.
The end.
Life is boring I hate life.
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Mythical Creatures Gone Wrong
HumorYou know them. Unicorns, dragons, vampires, werewolves, mermaids, goblins, witches, pegasuses, and so on. But what we know of them is just a stereotype. I gathered a few of my mythical friends to write a week in their daily life. It's time to reveal...