Broken?

Chapter 13

It's happening again.

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I grab on to the wall. I hate crying, especially out in the open. I rush towards an empty corridor and hide in a small opening, sliding down the wall with tears in my eyes. I thought this was over.

It's been a year since I've started receiving these letters. I know I shouldn't read this by myself so I pick myself up and dry my tears.

I walk towards the common room in the direction of Draco's room and knock on his door. I hear shuffling and a bit of cussing as I wait for him to open the door.

His door swings open and the first thing I see is the mess that is his hair, not to mention his shirt is inside out. I look behind him and see Pansy with disheveled hair and her shirt buttons are almost all opened.

"Oh did I interrupt something?" I say with a smirk, remembering what they did to me and Mattheo.

"Oh shut up. What do you need Maisie?" Draco asks as he tries to fix his hair, a bit annoyed.

"I need Pansy." I say looking down starting to pick at the skin around my nails and biting the inside of my cheek.

"Maisie are you alright?" Draco asks concerned.

"Yes, just bring Pansy please." I say picking harder.

"Maisie, can it wait?" Pansy asks, putting her arm on Draco's shoulder to gently pull him away from the door. Her long black hair moving gracefully over her shoulder.

"Pansy, I...urm...no it can't."

"Can you just tell me tomorrow please my head is pounding. I took the potion for clearing my mind and I'm not in the right mood."

"Oh, yeah. Urm it's no problem. I'm just going to go."

I start to feel aware of how my clothes feel on my skin, how I start to feel the air around me diminish.

After Pansy closes the door I rush down the boys dormitory. I just want to feel something similar. I apparate the letter to my room, unknowing of what's in there.

I struggle with my thoughts as I get closer. It worsens as I knock on his door. The embarrassment, insecurities and uncertainty runs through my mind.

"Maisie?" Mattheo asks in confusion.

I look down at my hands and see that my nails are bleeding from picking at them. Now that I have him here in front of me, I feel like all the oxygen in the room is being taken from me. I hold in my tears, refusing to cry in front of him. I wrap my arms around my torso and try not to look into his eyes.

"Maisie are you alright?" He asks again.

"Can...can I stay with you?" I ask and avoid his eyes. The needles in the back of my brain have me stuttering a bit.

"Urm, I really do.."

"Please.....just please," I whisper the last of my plead.

I can tell he is looking at me with worry and curiosity but I ignore it. I walk into his room.

I sit down on his bed, my hands on my lap. He walks towards me and picks my head up.

"Maisie, I'm asking one last time. Is everything okay?"

"Can...I just...need... Can you just hold me, please." I continue to pick at my skin, uncertain of what else to do.

He looks at me with concern but obliges anyways. He lays down on his bed and waits for me to lay down next to him. I fix myself beside him and turn the other way.