Shards of Sugar (2022 - 2023) | Poetry

23.) being the moon

I gift myself the knowledge that I missed the shooting stars that came on recent nights,
like my life is satire, but I'm not laughing, no-one is.
I know where to find youth, in the present, for all you shallow, vain people whose heads have been dyed the shade of snow.
My hands precede me because society values craftiness
and my spine hurts but I can't heal it because my back is the only thing I can't touch.
I find dopamine on a silver screen I've got no self control, I know.
But my sleep is on the mend, in a distant land that I do not know.
And I can try every day
but I always fall back down anyway.
So, don't tell me to be something I've never been.
I can try to leave but exists repel my grip.
And I lie to myself everyday,
that maybe someday I'll change.
But, I brought this upon myself, that I know.
And I'll be the only person to pay the price.
I think I should stop indulging in this sleepless vice.
I tell the night sky 'don't tell me to sleep tonight before morn''
Because you know that I would take my time,
and that I'm attached to the night.
Don't tell me to shut my eyelids closed.
Because they're open always even when I'm asleep.
Because I still wish to see the night darken until it brightens into day.
Maybe one day I'll rise with the sun
But that day isn't any time soon, I'll tell you that, son.
And I'll lie to myself and yes I'll try for myself,
but in the end I shall fail.
So don't tell me to go against the stars above or God.
I lay awake to watch them glow and shine,
to listen to this silly heart of mine.
So, don't tell me to be something I'm not.
Because I remind me everyday,
that even when I'll change I'll be the same.
This lifestyle is like being the moon.
I sit beside the stars behind the darkness too.
But if the sky is black and I am silver, and the stars are white where is the colour?
Don't tell me to set that'll make me upset don't you know?
Because it's time I eclipsed the sun,
and stole its light from everyone.
I'm just a selfish moon, what did you expect?
A little discipline or self-respect?
But if I go I'll miss the stars so much so,
I wouldn't know what to do with myself, no.
So, I'll tell me to leave, I'll tell me to go.
︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎∞︎︎
ద     ద 𖦊 ꪉ 𐀔 𐃸 ద   𖦊  ʊ
༒    ༒ ༒ ༒  .   .      ༒ .   . ༒
༒ ༒ ᜊ ༒              ༒       ༒
༒ ༒  ༒
༒ ༒  ༒ . . ༒
༒ ༒  ༒ . . ༒
ద                  ༒
༒ . ༒
༒ . . ᰔ
༒
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