20 | no way out.

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chapter twenty.
no way out.

 no way out

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Edwin and I ate breakfast—a bowl of Cheerios each—together in my dining room the following morning. The boy was reassuring me that he was feeling a lot better after sleeping when my father suddenly walked in, that same blank expression he wore at dinner the previous day still on his face.

I didn't say good morning to him, because I never did. Edwin fell silent and so I started talking about school to try and fill the awkward air with something casual that wouldn't possibly set off my dad or something. I was glad Edwin stopped talking as well, because I didn't want my dad to know too much about my boyfriend's personal life. It just felt uncomfortable to me. My dad was a dangerous person, he didn't need to know the secrets of my friends and possibly use it against them, or even against me in some weird, fucked up way.

I kept going on about a difficult assignment for my science class that Jackson and I were collaborating on until eventually my dad left a few minutes later, a plate of toast and a mug of coffee in hand. He went into the living room and turned on the television much too loud for my liking, probably so he could drown out Edwin and I for whatever reason.

"My dad's been acting weird recently," I whispered, staring down the hallway that the man disappeared down. "And yesterday, at dinner, he was giving me some weird looks."

"I know. I noticed. He just kept...staring at you." Edwin agreed.

I just sighed, knowing that whatever it was would come up eventually, hopefully sooner rather than later so I could get it over with instead of feeling more anxiety than usual around my father.

At noon, Nathan came to pick Edwin up. I walked him to the car, trying not to tear up at the fact that I wouldn't see him again until Monday. Because I had never been in a relationship before, I didn't realize how difficult it was to leave your significant other for any longer than a day. It felt like a piece of myself was gone.

"Let's call later, okay?" Edwin said to try and cheer me up. I nodded solemnly. He then wrapped his arms around me for a moment and held me pressed to his chest. When he pulled away, he gave me one final kiss on the cheek before grabbing the passenger side door handle of his brother's car. "Bye." he smiled at me.

"Bye." I replied, smiling back at him despite not feeling happy at all inside.

I returned inside once the car pulled away and immediately I went to go upstairs to my room, but not before my dad yelled my name from the living room that was right across the hall from the staircase.

I walked into the room, feeling like I was going to vomit. Whatever my dad was upset about, I knew right then and there that he was going to talk about it.

I glanced at my mom who was sitting a few feet away from my dad on the couch, staring hard into the floor while she picked at the bracelets on her wrist. I then watched as my dad picked up the remote to mute the TV before turning to face me from his spot on the couch.

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