Good to You [Eddie Munson x OFC]

Chapter Two

My dad passed away when I was twelve. His funeral is when it started to feel real. I still have flashbacks and replayed memories floating through my mind every now and then. The memories are so vivid, it's like I'm reliving the moment all over again. One moment I remember the most is standing in the church with everyone surrounding the casket. It was January and the snow was furious outside. The priest had chosen to do prayers inside to keep us out of the elements. I stared blankly at the casket, unsure of where my consciousness had gone. I watched my world crumble around me. I felt an arm come around and rest on my shoulders as I held back the tears that started to form in the corners of my eyes. The arm hugged me in closer and I couldn't hold back the stream of salty tears any longer. The comfort of the warm hug surrounded me and my shoulders shook from the sobs. In that singular moment, I knew I wasn't alone; but the moments to come would feel utterly bitter.

As days passed and the reality set in deeper, I retreated back further into my introverted cave. What do you do when your world comes to a screeching halt? Everything you knew to be normal isn't normal anymore. A fog descends upon you and the world, once full of beautiful colors, has faded all away to a gray monotone. The hardest thing about all of this is you don't even know why. Why did everything suddenly change? Why can't I control this? Where is my life heading now that it's gone off course on autopilot? I had so many questions and they all remained unanswered. I figured that this was just me. I always enjoyed isolating myself. This must just be the type of person I am. I was twelve, going on thirteen, and it seemed like everyone around me was figuring themselves out and I couldn't figure out who I truly was because depression became the main character of my life.

I lost myself in darkness. As I got into high school, I let myself be used by boys who I naively thought cared about me. I thought they could fill the hole in my heart left behind by my father. The very first boy to take a piece of me with him was Billy Hargrove. When I was in tenth grade and Billy was in eleventh, he took an interest in me, and myself being vulnerable and searching for a love to fill the void left behind by my father, I took what he gave me and believed it was love. It's hard to explain, but when you lose the only person in your life who showed you unconditional love, you start to search for it again and latch onto love wherever you can find it, even if it's just disguised as love. Billy was the first boy I ever did anything with, but what I didn't know is that was all he wanted from me and his love for me didn't extend to the length I thought it did. Either he was a fantastic actor, or I was an idiot for believing everything he said.

Last summer, I was lifeguarding at the local community pool with, who else, but Billy; and I was going to be spending my summer with him again. We had our yearly beginning of the season orientation for all lifeguards on Friday morning. The only thing I wanted to do on Friday was see Robin and Nancy at our sleepover, but of course I had to see one of the people who helped drive my life into ruins.

"Cassandra," Billy's voice cooed as I showed up at orientation that morning. "Another summer we get to spend together, I see."

I avoided eye contact with Billy and stepped in line with the rest of the lifeguards. It was as if he knew how much he had stripped away from me and he enjoyed watching me suffer and squirm.

I tried to avoid him at all costs throughout the course of the orientation but every now and then I would look up and see him eyeing me over the rims of his aviator sunglasses. He was like a parasite and I don't understand why it was me he chose to suck the life out of when he could be with any girl he wanted and throw them away just like he had done with me. He had a fixation on me, and I'm not sure why.

As orientation drew to a close, I looked over and saw John and my nerves began to calm. John was the maintenance man at the pool and had easily become like a second father to me after my dad passed six years ago. He was this adorable little man, in his sixties, with a full beard of graying hair. He waved to me from across the way, and I gave him a smile back. I knew I could survive this summer as long as I had John to watch over me.