MADMAN'S HAVEN

6

(🎶 Touch - Sleeping At Last)

"Beverly, I had to! I know you'll understand! Please Beverly!"

The repetition of the frantic words broke my heart into thousands of pieces just like I was made of glass.

The way he screamed as the broad guards gripped him roughly to drag him away from the dramatic scene was something outstanding from the other patients that screamed out of panic and fright. The raspy voice pinched my eardrums and I remembered how I felt so extremely humiliated as he spelled my name to own my attention.

The already dramatic situation was brought with even more disturbance than before as the convicted murderer shouted out for compassion.

As I was so destroyed and torn down with fright and shock, all I could think about was the monstrous action and not the reason behind why it actually happened at all.

I thought Acker was just an innocent victim for Brandon to attack out of impulsive fury or psychotic seizure. Like he was just the unfortunate one that happened to be picked out with the bursting moment of urge.

But I was so wrong.

Every letter in his desperate selection of last words fell into place like the last missing pieces of the puzzle.

Of course, he thought I would understand, because he believed me to be so much smarter than I actually was.

Even if he never mentioned his stepfather by name, this should've come to my knowledge so much sooner. I should've been able to figure this out myself after the first time Harriet told me about the new inmate, and especially after what Brandon told me about his past.

I had enough information to tie it all together, but I was so blinded from attention that it kept me from realizing that it could be any connection between the two psychopath inmates.

It was just too surreal to imagine that the bloodless killer that caused Brandon into miserable affliction, was currently present in the same building as the two of us.

The disappointment of stupidity rushed over me with even more guilt, and brought me into unbearable emotion.

I bit my tongue as I ran through the maze of chilly corridors and hoped with every step that I wouldn't have to meet with anyone along the way. I forced my tears to remain in their canals which burned the inside of my head.

My legs naturally walked with quick steps to get to the destination as fast as possible.

I dug for my keys in a desperate way in the pocket of my apron, and as I reached the door at the end of the narrow pathway, I roughly unlocked it with a shaking hand.

I threw the door behind me to close as I entered the medical repository. The room was dark which confirmed the desolation, and I was relieved by my loneliness.

I searched through the shelves of bottles and jars. Hundreds of different medicinal substances in alphabetic order were lined up in such an organized way.

It was satisfying to have the power of attending the supply. I had access to all of it.

With a pleasant hand, I grabbed one of the small liquid bottles with a white label.

'Morphine. Sulfate injection, USP. 10 milligram'

I breathed out in relief. Now I was so close to the rush of need.

I clenched the rubber band around my arm to pop my already screaming vein, and I slowly filled the syringe with the poisonous fluid. I carefully hit the glass pipe of the syringe to get rid of any air bubbles, before I slowly moved the needle toward the bend of my arm.

With my back leaned against the wall, I could finally let my tears out as I felt the drug reach my blood flow and affect every vein with the anodyne.

I breathed out heavily as I enjoyed the satisfaction of the quick influence.

This was all I needed.

It felt too good.

Every emotion vanished with the paralyzation and my caught-up brain could finally allow a break of delight.

I was already late to the gathering hour, but my abstinence from medical support had me too optimistic to care about that.

With trembling legs, I raised from my position where I sat against the cold wall, and took one deep breath to settle my aerial body before I carefully opened the door again to get out of the supply of addiction.

With my focus on spot and a calming state of mind, I walked into the gathering room with my head held high and a smile across my lips.

The people in the lieu stuck their eyes on me with penetrating stares as I walked past the occupied room, nurses such as patients, like no one ever taught them that it was audacious to glower.

"Hello, Bev,"

Janet's familiar voice of kindness reached my ear as I sat down in one of the armchairs beside her.

I responded with a smile.

"I got stuck in the office, I'm sorry about my delay," I lied.

Janet shook her head and looked at Mildred who sat peacefully opposed to us in silence.

"Don't worry about it, it seems to be a placid day today,"

Mildred nodded her head in agreement with Janet's allegation and I smiled at the two ladies.

"Are you still working with the delegation of Brandon's files?" Asked Mildred.

The mentioned name forced me to swallow.

It was two months ago since it all happened, but the paperwork of every patient was a process of time with details and important information, and it could take a very long time to finish the transmitting files.

"Fortunately I'm not. I finished the work last week and handed the papers over to nurse Browne that same day. I'm all done with that man now, I'm glad,"

I didn't know if I should feel empty with relief or miss. But the loud truth of being completely finished with Brandon made everything feel so strange.

"I'm glad to hear, Beverly. We know how hard it's been for you to progress what you witnessed. It must be so relieving to finally be rid of him,"

Mildred took my emotions for granted, of course, they thought that I was only trying to get rid of the trauma and avoid every detail of the liable killer. But they had no idea how much more there was to get over and move on from.

"It is, indeed," My voice rasped with vacillation but got left out of notice as Janet pursued the conversation.

"We heard that Harriet spoke to you,"

The intrusive information that affirmed the gossip between my friends left me uncomfortable. But I soon came to realize that the admitted mistake in communication with the Joseph Acker transmission, was probably not a secret.

"I'm glad she did,"

I kept my words short.

"You deserved to know," Mildred interposed.

She was right. I did deserve to know, no matter how illusive and bewildering the information was, and how confused it got me.

But I needed this for my recovery, I just had to adapt it first and comprehend the actual truth,

That Brandon wasn't as monstrous as the aggravating circumstances manipulated me to believe.