Nothing shines as bright as your eyes - (Leah Williamson x OC)

Part 16

The last few weeks went by incredibly fast. Emma left after spending about a week at mine. It was so hard to say goodbye again, but I didn't really have any other choice. I couldn't keep taking her with me to training, and for away games it would be completely impossible, luckily I didn't have any away games the week she was with me. Otherwise I would have had a big, big problem.

I knew it was best for the both of us if Emma went back to the Netherlands with my aunt and uncle. So with a big hug and a last look over her shoulder, she walked towards the gate. The wall of the gate was completely made of glass, and so Emma pressed her face against it and waved a warm goodbye with her tiny hand. I waved back, trying to hide my sad expression, and walked towards where I had parked my car.

As soon as I had sat down behind the steering wheel, I broke down. I don't know what had gotten into me. But one tear slipped, and before I knew it I was absolutely bawling my eyes out. I wasn't a cryer. I can't remember I cried this hard since I got the news of the passing of my parents.

I didn't know what it was that made me so sad. Was it Emma leaving? Or was it that right now I really didn't have any family around me anymore? Of course, Lauren felt like a sister to me, but it just wasn't the same. Or was it just too much for me? I still hadn't performed on the pitch, the way I wanted to. Maybe I just wasn't good enough. Or maybe I was secretly still not over the death of my parents. And then the situation with the England camp. I acted like it didn't bother me, but it did, more than I'll ever let anyone know. I just didn't know what to do with myself anymore.

Thinking back about that moment in the car, I was embarrassed. I know it's nothing to be embarrassed about, but I didn't know why I let such stupid things get to me so much. I hated-

I was snapped out of my train of thought by my phone going off. It was Mark Parsons. That's a surprise, I didn't think I'd ever hear from him again. His number was in my contacts, because we had once spoken before. But I'd never actually expected him to call me. Even though I felt a bit hesitant to pick up the phone, since that one time we spoke was like half a year ago and he's only calling me now, I still picked up the phone.

"Hi, is this Stacy Taylor?" I heard him say through the phone. "Yes, it is." I replied as formal as possible, just like I had done with Sarina.

"Hi, I am calling to inform you that we have interest in calling you up for the upcoming international camp." Mark said casually. Well, for me it certainly wasn't casually. I had not expected this at all. "Oh, WoW. Ehm, thank you so much. But what exactly do you mean with 'interest'." I said, emphasising the 'interest'.

"It means we haven't yet made a definite decision, but that we seriously consider calling you up. I just thought I'd call you to share mine and the staff's thoughts. So that you wouldn't be kept in the dark, and you wouldn't be surprised if you received a call from me in the next couple of days." He explained.

That was a lot to process. He, obviously, knows that I spent my previous international break at the England camp. So, maybe he's trying to claim me? Though, I doubt that he would make such an effort to try and get me to play for the Netherlands.

"Thank you, I look forward to receiving the phone call with your decision." Lie. I didn't. Not at all. I didn't want to have to choose. Though, I knew it was inevitable. Eventually, we said goodbye and hung up the phone.

This also reminded me that it was almost two weeks before the international break, and I still hadn't called Sarina with my own decision. I had two days to think about it.

And, not to forget, in a few days we had the game against Arsenal. Which I was really nervous about. I had been training at the best of my ability, to try and earn a spot in the starting eleven.

~~~

It was now a few days later. Yesterday I had received another call from Mark Parsons, confirming that I was indeed called up for the Dutch squad.

This made my decision so much more difficult. I, by now, knew very well that I sucked at making decisions. Though, at least I made one. I was going to call Sarina tomorrow. That meant I had only one day to go over my decision.

This was going to be tough.

A/N
- helloooo, hope you enjoyed this chapter! It's a bit shorter than usual, but maybe I'll drop another update tonight and otherwise tomorrow.
- see you at the next one! Have a lovely day.

:)