A Harry Potter and Twilight crossover

Chapter 8-Beware of the Voldeturi! We Have Cupcakes!

Chapter 8-Beware of the Voldeturi! We Have Cupcakes!

Jane snuck along the hallways and would occasionally peer into the rooms, then would walk on. She was trying to figure out how many students were here and how many teachers. She went back to her own room she had to herself and called the Volturi.

"Hello?" Caius answered.

"Hey wife beater, is Aro there?" Jane asked.

"I'm not a wife beater for the last time!" Caius growled.

"Then why did you kill Irina? She made a simple mistake." Jane said.

"I-uh-I." Caius stammered.

"Though so, now, is Aro there?" Jane asked.

"Yeah, hold on, ARO!" Caius yelled.

"What? I am in the middle of watching Spongebob!" Aro called.

"It's Jane!" Aro said.

"Oh, coming!" There was a loud noise, a bang, and a yelp. "Hello?" Aro asked.

"Yeah hi, I have some freaky news." Jane said.

"What?" Aro asked.

"The Cullen's. When you asked me to follow them, they wound up in this castle called Hogwarts, it's a school and guess what they teach?" Jane said.

"What? Math?" Aro grumbled.

"No! They teach witchcraft!" Jane almost yelled.

"...Are you OK?" Aro asked.

"I'm fine! You just have to come here to believe it! It's by London." Jane explained.

"We'll have Demetri follow your scent." Aro said.

"Alright, i can't wait to see the look on your face when you show up!" She said, excited.

"Yeah, me neither, got to go, Patrick just fell off a cliff and is looking for his head." Aro said quickly.

"Huh?" Jane asked, but Aro hung up.

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"Tackle it." Renesmee pointed.

"i don't know, that tree looks really violent." Jacob said. The Whomping Willow stood before them.

"Your a wimp!" Renesmee chanted (the other word would have been to mature for her xD).

"Am not! I'll take that tree on!" Jacob cracked his hands and neck.

"That's disgusting." Renesmee said.

"Whatever, AHHHH!" Jacob ran at the tree and hit it at full speed. The Whomping Willow seemed to jump, then it raised one of it's branches and swung down on Jacob. "OW!" Jacob yelled. Renesmee started laughing.

"You're getting beaten up by a tree!" She said.

"Ow! Help- ow-please!" Jacob called as the tree smacked him. It raised one of it's branches and hit his butt. "The tree is trying to get fresh with me!" Jacob yelped.

"Hold on, hold on." Renesmee grumbled and pulled out a match and light it. "Hey, stupid tree, let go of Jake or you'll go up in flames!" Renesmee motioned, pointing to the match. The Whomping Willow complied and let Jacob go who stumbled away. "Are you OK?" Renesmee asked walking forward.

"Yeah, yeah, my bones will heal by themselves." Jacob said. They walked back up to the castle.

"Hello Renesmee." A voice said. They stopped and looked around. A bunch of figures with black cloaks appeared out of no were.

"Aro?" Renesmee asked.

"Yes, and I brought a friend! His name is Voldemort. We call each other the Voldeturi!" Aro said.

"Hello." Voldemort stepped forward.

"Were did your nose go?" Jacob asked.

"Huh?" Voldemort stepped back.

"Yeah! And your hair!" Renesmee said.

"Don't pick on my friend! He makes really good cupcakes! Right Caius?" Aro asked. Caius was stuffing himself with a cupcake.

"Yeah." He said, his mouth full, cupcake crumbs falling down his chin.

"Baldy! Baldy!" Jacob and Renesmee chanted.

"You guys are mean! I hate you! Wah! Mommy!" Voldemort ran away, flinging his arms.

"OK." Aro said.

"Wait! Come back! I LOVE YOUR CUPCAKES!" Caius chased after him.

"GET AWAY FROM ME YOU FAG!" Voldemort ran into the forbidden forest.

"GIMME YOUR CUPCAKES!" Caius roared.

"Even weirder." Marcus said.

"Anyway, were is Jane, she said this castle taught witchcraft to kids." Aro said.

"Yeah, this way, Jane is in the kitchen!" Renesmee motioned and bolted inside the castle.

The Vulturi ran after her and arrived inside the kitchen.

"Hello! Would you like some food?" the elves crowded around them.

"Whoa! The Keebler Elves!" Alec said, looking around.

"Uh, we are looking for Jane." Aro said in a childish voice. They all pointed to Jane who was sitting by the fire with another elf who seemed to be drunk.

"DRINK THIS!" Jane yelled, shoving beer down her throat. The elf flailed around, the beer splashing on her.

"Jane! What the hell?" Aro said, shoving the elf away.

"I was trying to get the elf drunk." Jane said and stood up.

"Why?" Aro asked.

"I was bored. But I'm glad you came! Were is Caius?" Jane looked around.

"Chasing a guy for cupcakes through the forest." Aro explained.

"What a retard." Jane muttered.

"So what is it you wanted to show us?" Demetri asked.

"Oh yeah, this way! You have to see what these kids are being taught!" Jane said and lead them to a random class. They went into the Transfiguration class, and guess who was there? Harry and Pals! Aro tripped over a load of books, but got back up. Demetri tried to sit on a bench, but he broke it and it fell down, him along with it.

"I'm OK!" He whispered loudly.

"Is that it?" Professer McGonagall asked, looking mad.

"Yeah, we wont interrupt again, sorry." Jane said as they took seats in the back.

"Now, as Iw as saying-" She started.

"HEY GUYS! I GOT THE CUPCAKES!" Caius ran in, tripped over the same books as Aro did, fell on his back, and the Cupcakes fell on him, the icing splattering all over him. "NOOOO!" Caius yelled loudly. Everyone jumped and looked at him. "THE CUPCAKES! QUICKLY SAVE THEM!" Caius started to pick them up.

"I am afraid you guys will have to leave." McGonagall said.

"Don't worry, we will." Jane said and all of the Volturi had to drag out Caius from the room, who was still sobbing.

"Caius, they are freakin cupcakes! Get over it!" Aro said, shaking him.

"I know! Let's go look for the guy! I bet he has tons of other cupcakes!" Caius said and ran off, out of the castle and back to the forest, the rest of the Volturi after him.

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I'm bored.... So i uploaded............