wellston but hell | unOrdinary Chatfic

costco bird

whydoiexist: guys help

Blick: what

whydoiexist: there's a fucking bird in a costco

Fine: I'm sorry how is that a problem

whydoiexist: THERE'S A LIVE CHICKEN IN A SUPERMARKET

Fine: so? One escaped from the bird enclosure, not a big deal

whydoiexist: THIS ISN'T A FUCKING ZOO JOHN

whydoiexist: qnd what zoo did you go to that had a chicken enclosure? Was it called "the barn (but a zoo)" or something

Fine: yeah it's owned by Joe

Blick: who's Joe

Fine: you've fallen right into my trap

whydoiexist: JOHN NO

Fine: JOE-

Asslo: Shut the fuck up, dimwits

Fine: huh a new insult

Fine: yeah well fuck you and your girlfriend

Fine: oh wait :)

Asslo:

Sera: bitchlo there's no coming back after that

Asslo:

Blick: bro you didn't have to kill him

Fine: he's dead on the inside

Fine: dead on the outside

Fine: and dead on the inbetweenside

whydoiexist: the fuckin what

Blick: it's a language I do not speak

Cecile: you know we have class right

Blick: sorry I'm busy scrolling through Reddit

whydoiexist: I'm stressing over this live chicken in a Costco

Blick: maybe it escaped from the rotisserie heater upper

whydoiexist: first if all what the fuck is a heater upper

whydoiexist: second of all, ah yes, it escaped alive, neck and all

Cecile: what the fuck do you idiots plan to do in college

whydoiexist: fuck is that

Cecile: oh my god you're all hopeless

Fine: w e k n o w

Sera: well John was hopeless

Fine: rude

Sera: also John have you seen my headphones

Fine: you mean the black ones you wear every time we drive in a car

Sera: yeah

Fine: uhhhhh I think they're in my bag

Fine: you gave them to me a while ago

Sera: ah thanks

Fine: but can't you just rewind time or something and figure out

Sera: well then you'd be the only one confused as fuck because you'd sense the several day time change

Blick: why wouldn't we notice

Sera: because when I do a time reset I alter the entire planet because unlike John I don't have the ability to suppress the range on my ability

Fine: I'm just built different