Choices [ENG]

17.

I open my eyes and I am forced to cover them with my hand because of too much sun coming through the window. I'm very tired, not because it's early, but because I really struggled to sleep last night: I kept thinking about Jesse. The scene of our kiss kept repeating itself in my head and I squeezed my pillow tightly, while I felt like my stomach contract. Won't they be what Dina calls "butterflies in the stomach"?

I sit up in bed and stretch. Ashley comes out of the bathroom with a towel over her shoulders. "Good morning!" she exclaims with her usual good humor. "Good morning!" I also exclaim in a good mood.

"Why are you in a good mood? Did you have a good dream?" she asks arranging his things.

"I hope it wasn't just a dream ..." I say raising my eyebrows. I'm about to go into the bathroom when Ashley stops me by the arm.

"Does Jesse have something to do with it?" she asks.

I bite my lip unwittingly. Ashley opens her mouth wide in amazement.

"Did you guys kiss ?!" Screams a little too loud considering the time. "Shhh! Don't scream!" I say raising my index finger in front of my 32-tooth smile.

"I CAN NOT BELIEVE IT!" Ashley continues, however, with a more restrained tone. "When? How? Was it nice? You won't leave here now, until you've told me EVERYTHING" she says, making me sit next to her on the bed.

Between one scream and the other, I tell her about last night's kiss.

"Oh dear Charlie, I'm so happy for you! You even found a boyfriend!" She exclaims more and more gassed. "He's not my boyfriend ..." I say embarrassed. "Of course he is!" Ashley exclaims that at any moment, I imagine myself starting to jump from one side of the room to the other. She doesn't look like a girl who grew up in our years, she seems so full of hope, of joy, as if she was still deluded that we could find a solution to all this crap. Anyway, I love her energy and her being so sunny. It always brightens my day and helps me to give weight to the little joys of every day. She is perhaps the one that taught me most of all here.

"What about you and Austin instead?" I ask as we walk towards the cafeteria.

"I don't have to say anything " Ashley replies, keeping her eyes straight in front of her.

"Are you sure?" I ask giving her a light nudge.

"Oh of course!" She exclaims as if you've been too insistent.

"Last night, he walked me to my room and we talked about what happened during the spin of the bottle. We both admitted that we enjoyed the kiss and that maybe there was interest, but maybe we should wait and see what happens "she explains, very serious.

"Why are you so serious? It's a beautiful thing!" I exclaim, practically beside myself.

"Yes, but I'm afraid, I've never had a boyfriend ..." she says as she opens the door to the canteen.

"And so? Do I look like one who had a thousand?" I ask, pointing at me with both hands and with an absolutely ironic tone. Ashley laughs.

"You're right, maybe I should just live what happens to me to the fullest. Right?" she asks.

"That's what you always tell me and it has always worked, I don't see why it shouldn't apply even in this situation" I say stroking her arm.

We approach the table where we saw Dina, Ellie and Glenn sitting. "Good morning!" Glenn exclaims also incredibly in a good mood. It seems like this morning, we injected everyone with a dose of happiness. We respond to his greeting and sit on the same side of the table as the broad-shouldered boy.