Hold Me Now

Chapter 38: Goodbyes

After a draini

Before going to sleep Monday night, Johnny and Ava had hoped to sleep in. That was short-lived when a knock on the door, at eight in the morning, sounded. The cable and telephone guys were there, bright and early. They both got up, while the men hooked up all of the necessary connections. By ten Tuesday morning, they had a dial tone and MTV. Life was grand for a moment. Then it was time for them to go clean out their old childhood bedrooms.

Saying goodbye is never easy. But if you're brave enough to say goodbye, then there's bound to be a bunch of new hello's. For Johnny, it was easy to clean out his old boyhood room. He doesn't have as much stuff as Ava does. And the things he didn't want were bagged up, to give to a homeless shelter. His mother pretty much stayed out of the way, the whole time. 

It was too sad for her to know her baby boy, for he is still her baby boy no matter how old he gets, won't be living under her roof anymore. She had cried and cried Monday night over the thought of it. Luckily Sid was comforting. She thought she had more time with her son before he graduated. Now she's an empty nester before the nest should be empty. One of the hardest things to do in life is to grieve the loss of someone who's still alive. That's how Laura feels in her spirit, grief and loss. 

The irony is she has always known that Ava was the one for Johnny. That's partly why she could never truly warm up to Ali. The girl is fine in her own way, she just wasn't fine for her son. But Ava is and always has been. She's constantly felt that in her soul, even when the pair were broken up. She just didn't think they'd be married right now. 

In her mind, she pictured it a year or two down the road. But here they are, married and owning a house. Even though letting go is hard, she loves her daughter-in-law. She's always wanted a little girl. Although Ava isn't her own little girl, she's excited to have someone to do dote on and buy girly things for. Ava is a godsend for her son and family. So she kept busy while they worked on his room upstairs.

Once they finished cleaning out Johnny's room and loading things onto a moving truck, it was time to say goodbye to his mother. Ava lingered in the background, while Johnny took his mom and sat on the sofa with her. He had told Ava earlier that morning "Just know I'll probably cry. But just don't make a big deal of it. I probably won't be in the mood to talk after we leave her either. I love you, and that's why I'm letting you know this now." She totally understands as she'll most likely feel the same with her own mom. 

Holding his mom's hands in both of his own, he began talking. "Mom I love you. For eighteen years you've been my go-to person, my guider and provider. You've given me love and encouragement when I was mistreated and misunderstood. You were the person I cried to when I was a friendless loser in middle school. You were the person I cried to when I thought I'd never meet a girl. And you were the first person I told when I met Ava." His mom started crying at hearing his words and thinking of the memories. 

The lump in Johnny's throat threatened to break out and his voice started wavering. "Mom I know you're disappointed because we eloped. But I love you and we didn't do it on purpose. One day you need to come over to our house and we'll tell you the full story. You'll probably laugh your butt off like our friends did. But Mom I want you to know, I'm SO happy to have had a mother like you growing up. A mom who loves me and tries to do what's best for me, even marrying Sid (even though he hates me)." He squeezed his mom's hands.

Then he turned his face to look at Ava and smiled. He looked back at his mom and told her "It's because of your strength and teaching and influence that I want to be the best man and husband I can to be to her. So, thank you." He pulled his mom into his embrace. They both cried, as did Ava.