To Stay By Your Side

Chapter Fifteen

Author's Note: 

So I'm sure you guys might be wondering to what happened to Felix in the past. So this is a flashback chapter since I can't think of anything else-

Trigger Warnings:

Cursing 

Blood

Injuries 

Trauma

Captivity 

Violence

Homophobia 

Mention Of Murder

Felixs' P.O.V

Hearing Malcolm's footsteps fading away I started to listen to the waves crashing against each other, slowly falling asleep. 

"I..I think I love Pan?" I muttered under my breath confessing this to my friends hoping they'd understand. 

They looked at me with horror and disgust as if I just said I committed murder. What was wrong with me liking Pan? They all backed up a few feet and I just stood there frozen solid other than fidgeting while watching their every move.

"I knew something was wrong with you ever since we met! I should've stayed away you. Nobody and I mean nobody not even Pan would want to be around you." One of them hissed full of spite.

I felt like I got struck with a knife. Why would he say that? Then my heart sank noticing that I actually will get hurt both emotionally and physically. 

I saw a dagger getting thrown toward me and thankfully it went past me but left a graze on my arm. Putting a hand over the graze and turning around to run, I kept looking back to see if anything else would cause me to die.  

I was running through the forest feeling like that I kept going in circles,  doing my best to dodge their weapons while tripping over roots and huge rocks. C'mon almost to where everyone else is, ALMOST. Then I felt a piercing, sharp, cold dagger stab me. I fell, everything was spinning but I still tried to get up, I just couldn't. I just wanted Pan.. was that a problem? Then I heard laughing, 

"You're going nowhere Felix, either you die or not like boys. It's gross."

Then I felt someone grab my leg, I couldn't fight. Then I blacked out.

I woke up finding myself in a cage, a prison, blood everywhere knowing it's my own with all the pain and cuts I got. Liking guys can't be that bad right..?  

This is starting to make me think I'm fucked up, I hate this. Then the door opened and I got dragged out and put on my two feet. I stared at the people I used to call friends.

I got stabbed in the stomach...

Then I woke up........

I gasped and sat straight up, waking up in cold sweat and for some reason pulled up my shirt but knowing the blade wasn't actually there but I still checked. I stood up, brushing all the sand off that I could and shaking my head getting a little sand out. I turned around and started to walk back to camp, purposely taking my time.

Knowing I'm a monster from what I did to them, murdering them in cold blood. No emotion, no feelings. 

Did they deserve it?

"I don't even know." 

Pans' P.O.V

I started to play my pipes in boredom while sitting on a log in front of the campfire. Watching everyone go around the fire having a great time, unlike me. What should I do after playing my pipes? Is there even anything I can actually do without being tracked down by Nova? Probably not. 

Then, I noticed Felix was back with his facial expression looking conflicted, as if he's making a huge decision that is life or death. He started to pace back and forth staring at the ground like it was the second most interesting thing in the world. How long will I have to keep acting?! I wanna be there for Felix but I can't if I have Nova breathing down my neck and watching my every move. I mean I could just kill Nova and get it over with but I'm curious. 

But curiosity killed the cat, right?

I could just make a potion to force Nova to tell the truth.. should be easy enough. Still watching Felix I could also see Malcolm and a few other Lost Boys looking over at Felix wondering what is going on with him. The  again he's always been that type of guy that keeps a lot of personal things to himself, never really opening up to people. Even every time I ask it seems like he's more and more nervous and guarded to tell me anything. I wouldn't ever force him to tell me anything, I just want to know.

I could feel two people staring down at me, I looked up seeing both Felix and Nova were looking down at me with a curious glint in their eyes. 

Nova gave me a 'warm' smile while Felix give me a sarcastic eye roll with a small chuckle. Felix stood up straight, rubbing the back of his neck he started to speak in a soft voice.

"Are you alright? You look both angry and on the verge of tears. That is why I came over, I'll just go back to where I was, I just wanted to know if you were alright," Felix turned to face Nova possibly meaning to go in that direction. All he did was obviously purposely bump into Nova and kept walking back to where he was originally. Now I'm alone with Nova. Great.

I stood up putting my pipes back on my belt, then told Nova that I'm going to go talk to Felix. He tensed up but nodded and followed me, which I really didn't want but I still have to act. 

Felix went back to pacing back and forth looking conflicted again, he stopped when he noticed us, his eyes flickering back and forth between us. He's waiting for one of us to talk.

"I think I should introduce myself," I started out hoping he'd go first so I quickly added, "And you should as well."

"I'll go first then," He bowed with his eyes closed, his deep voice had a little hint of flirt, "My name is Felix, I'm mostly a loner so I don't really talk much. If you need anything from me I'd either be here or somewhere close by."

Nodding already knowing this he stood up straight waiting for me.

"I'm Peter, Peter Pan. Everyone calls me Pan around here so you may call me that if you like. I'm the leader here, so I'll also be here if you need anything."

Nova I'm pretty sure felt threatened by Felix because he put his arm around my waist, moving closer to me. Both of them were glaring at each other, sharp like daggers and cold as ice. Nova's jaw was clenched while Felix was calming down and looking zoned out. 

"I think I might go practice my fighting skills or something, I'll see you guys la--"

Everyone was at camp and there aren't any animals on Neverland so what was rustling in the bushes?

A boy with dark chocolate hair popped out and jumped in front of Felix, his eyes blazing looking at Felix. Felix backed up a few inches looking horrified, he was lost for words. The other boy grinned wickedly as if he was loving Felixs' reaction of the sight of him.

Felix finally spoke up but it sounded like a little squeak, I couldn't make out what he said. The other boy raised an eyebrow also wondering what Felix said.

"I KILLED YOU.."