Chapter 7 : On and Off

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She took the glass from your hand, her fingertips sliding against yours for a moment, leaving your breath a a ball in the back of you throat. You took another step in her direction, watching as she sipped from the edge of the glass. You thought that perhaps you were obsessed with her - you eyed her mouth as it touched the edge of the cup, watching where her lips had been, the remnants of her drinking staining the rim. You wanted it back, so you could drink from that same spot. It'd be the closest you'd get to her lips ever again and you weren't going to let it slip away.

Instead of handing you the glass, she placed it on the surface of a table, pushed against the wall of the hallway. She leant, relaxing a little, her hand still remaining wrapped round the cup.
"Can I ask you something personal now."
Her voice was quieter, lower than usual. She spoke in the tone above a whisper, tilting forward a little as you inched ever so slightly closer to her. It's like she was drawing you in. You couldn't even help yourself.
"Do you ever think about that night, Y/N?"
You teased her slightly, "What night?".
She pushed you back by your shoulder. You laughed a little, your hand latching onto her wrist as you steadied yourself, only once you had, you found yourself unable to let go.
"Of course I do. Are you kidding? Every day. It's all I think about."
She tugged her bottom lip between her teeth, her sultry gaze encasing you in a lustful desire that you struggled with every urging moment to push to the pit of your gut. You couldn't. It's wrong.

"How about you, Nat?"
Nat? You've only recently been promoted to first name basis, what made you think a nickname was within boundaries.
"You know I can't answer that."
You took a final step towards her, your bodies just one wrong move away from touching. She slid her fingers gently up the side of your thigh, tracing your hip and ribs, making their way to the mid of your back to pull you closer.
"I know you can't. So show me, Miss Romanoff."

Slowly, Natasha leant in, her lips barely making contact with yours. Her hands wandered, finding their way to the skin barely concealed by the vest. She hitched it slightly, your stomach becoming exposed to the crisp, cool air. A quiet whimper slipped past you, which Natasha caught in her mouth as she pressed her lips against yours, her tongue already pressing for entry.

She pulled back, the corners of her mouth slowly upturning as she observed your breathless state.
"Not tonight, Y/N."
You felt a bubbling of conflicting emotions rise towards the surface - pure and defined embarrassment being the most prominent of the clutter. Before you could dismiss yourself, she cut in, taking your hands in hers to keep you in place.
"You know we can't."
"Mhm." Your response rendered tones of mild fury. How could you be so naive?
"Miss Romanoff, I think your forget sometimes that we already did."
She was silenced momentarily, her head hanging a little lower.

"Come sleep in my room, it's warmer than the spare and you're shivering like a leaf."
She continued in complete ignorance of the truth you'd brought to light.
"No thanks."
You shook yourself from her, turning and briskly returning to the spare room. Tears pricked your eyes, which you internally scolded from reaching the skin of your cheeks. You couldn't believe your behaviour. Pathetic. You curled up beneath the sheets, forcing your eyes shut in other to subside any ill emotions that would keep you awake. Eventually, it was your own self reproach that sent you into slumber. A shameful reprimand of your ability to be strung along by this woman. You prayed you would dream of someone else - just this one night.

Morning shone through the slits of the dark blinds in Natasha's spare bedroom. You'd woken with the early sunrise, unable to fall into true sleep for a multitude of reasons. You assumed it'd be too early for Natasha to have woken, so you decided you'd up and ready yourself in order to make leaving this house as smooth and interaction free as possible. You stirred in bed for a moment, rubbing your eyes and running your hands through your hair before hearing a knock originate from the door. It could really only be one person.
She sauntered in sheepishly, as if she were afraid to see you. You found it difficult to remain displeased at her. She had a robe wrapped loosely round her figure, that slacked just enough to expose a little too much of her chest to you. Her hair was ruffled, falling loosely onto her face as she yawned and sat herself at the foot of the bed.

"I'm sorry about last night."
You swathed yourself in the sheets, sitting up to face her.
"Nothing to be sorry about. Forget it."
"There's plenty to be sorry about."
You stood, the sheets still clinging to your almost naked body. Although the room was dark, you had no intention of dropping them to reveal her nightwear that you were still encased in beneath.
"I need to get ready. Like I said, forget about it."
You walked round the foot of the bed, Natasha grabbing your concealed wrist, letting the silk sheet slip past your shoulder unintentionally.
"I think about that night every day. I saw you and instantly, you were the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen. You looked younger, I knew that, but part of me hoped that maybe my assumptions would be wrong."
You froze, watching as her cheeks grew a light crimson. She was chewing her inner cheek between words, twisting the material of her robe between her fingertips. She was nervous. Perhaps she really meant it.
"You know how hard this is for me, right? You're my student. If you weren't, I'd make sure you were mine in a minute. But...you are."

You leant forward, touching your lips to hers gently. To your surprise, she accepted the gesture, softly kissing back with a smile plastered to her face.
"No one needs to know, Natasha."
Slowly, you watched her grin fade as she hung her head, shaking it a little as she shuffled away from you.
She huffed before speaking.
"I'll see you downstairs, tea or coffee?"

She was so hot and cold. It fucking infuriated you.
"Coffee."
You lifted the sheet once more to conceal yourself, folding your arms into one another.
"Get out now. Please."
Natasha stood, her face scrunched as if she was planning on speaking. Though instead, she'd decided against it and left you alone without a word uttered. You changed quickly, throwing your hair into a tie messily, collecting your things and heading downstairs. You didn't have much of an appetite, though you thought it'd be rude not to eat what Natasha had set out for you.

You buried your head in the screen of your phone while eating, trying desperately to avoid even a fleeting moment of eye contact between yourself and Natasha. The last thing you wanted right now was to initiate conversation. Your phone was exploding with messages from your friends, all concerned about your location. You couldn't blame them, no one had heard from you since your walk to Natasha's yesterday. However, you couldn't just reply and ease your nerves, you needed to compose a lie, and to compose a lie, you most likely had to speak to Natasha.

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