𝐌𝐈𝐃𝐍𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑

439 5 19
                                    

TW/ Suicide, self destructive behaviour, eating disorder and mental health all mentioned
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I was woken up 45 minutes later by a gentle push by Xiao. I groan, sitting up and opening my eyes slowly to an almost empty car.

"Where is everyone?" I rub my eyes with one hand, I can't really see anything.
"They left to check in to the hotel, I stayed back cause you were asleep. On me." Xiao stopped, his cheeks were a slight pink.
"It's okay though, if you didn't have my shoulder then you would've hit your head" He smiles, I tilt my head to the left, a puzzled look on my face.
"Is everything okay?" Xiao laughs nervously.
"Never been better" I smile, hopping in the front seat, Xiao follows sitting in the driver's seat.
I smile "Hey what time is it?" I question because it looks like the sun has died.
"It's 11:45 they've already taken everything in but they've been in there for about 10 minutes" Xiao explains with a disgusted look on his face.
"Well I'm hungry?" I hint THAT we should go and get food, Xiao shakes his head.
"Oh please! I'm hungry!" I whine,
"Fine, fine! Stop whining" Xiao grunts.
"Ay! Look, it's my grumpy" I smile, teasing Xiao is fun when he teased me back but he just smiled. I've never been more scared in my life.
"They left the keys and want to go to Poundland?" Xiao looks at me "It's a ten minute drive??"

My eyes widen, I nod, buckling up.
"Put your phone aux, It's worth it" He smiles at me slightly handing the aux cord over.

I smile back at him, plugging in my phone and starting to play 505 by arctic monkeys as we pull out. I open my window and Xiao's with the master switch on my side. The roof window opens too, I laugh sticking my head out the window as we drive down the road.

"i'm going back to 505-

Xiao shouts the lyrics with me as the rain starts to sound like thunder is on our roof.

if it's a seven hour flight

Xiao puts his hand on my leg

or a forty-five minute drive

We pull into the car park

in my imagination

Xiao turns to me,and I turn to him, I see he gives me and up and down glance

you're waiting, lyin' on your side

Xiao unlocks our door and we step out into the pouring rain, i prop up my phone for a video, he grabs me by my hand and we dance wildly.

with my hands between your thighs,

He picks me up and spins me around, our lips meet while he holds me.

and a smile."

We let go of each other but his hands remain on my hips.
"Uh I'm sorry! Y/n I di-" I cut Xiao off by pressing my lips against his again.
"I love you Xiao.. I really do" I hold his face in my palms
"I love you too Y/n" Xiao pulls me into a tight hug, we are both drenched, but his cologne stays.

'Never mind I take it back now this is the scariest thing that has happened!'

I stop recording, turn off my music and Xiao locks the car.

We walk into the shop, me inside a massive trolley, we go straight to the snacks area, i pull everything into the trolley, lollipops, brain lickers, sour gummy snakes etc. We also go to the drinks where I take all the monsters possible except the ginger and the espresso one. Xiao takes some rockstar and Coca Cola. Before we go to the cashier we push the trolley around the store for a bit until a worker walks by but all she does is laugh with us.
We go to the check out, the lady from earlier was there.
"Have it for free it on me" her voice happy
"We will pay we can afford it" we both say.
"No no I was once a teenager. It's fun have it for free please" she smiles at us.
We thank her for leaving a £20 on the side for her good service next to her checkout.

We run back to the car with the trolley full of drinks and junk food.
We jump in the boot with all the food.
Xiao and I sort out a pile of whos food and drink is whos.
I put back in Spotify and play my music again but quieter.
"So... Y/n?" Xiao doesn't make eye contact with me while I crack open my monster.
"Actually before you say anything." I speak before he can finish.
"You don't wanna love me. Trust me" I warn him, he laughs.
"It's not like I'm serious, I'm a crazy bitch."
"Okay now I hear myself out loud I sound stupid. I'm serious though Xiao. I'm sorry I'm a crazy bitch"
"Oh really you're crazy? How?" Xiao smirks, he thinks I'm joking
"I got a lot of stuff to unpack. But mainly trying to kill myself and self destructive behaviour." I swirl my drink while I watch Xiao's face drop.
"So you've gone to the hospital?" He is on edge.
I nod.

'I push him away and all he does is come back. Pathetic.'

"How many times?" He is curious,

'No no! Be scared! Be scared of me! Don't try protect me!'

"12. Self destructive behaviour, Sucicide attempts, eating disorders, Anxiety shit you name it" I laugh, it doesn't scare him.

'Fuck! Shit man!'

"Okay change of subject!" I smiled.
"What happened earlier with.. us.?" His cheeks goes a pink
"You kissed me I kissed you I said I love you and you said you loved me."
"Why you wanna do it again??" I jokingly say.
"You know I didn't mean that" he does almost a pout at me.
"Come here" I squeeze his cheeks softly and kiss him " it's not that bad." I giggle at his bright red face.
"Red is your colour" I tease him
We agree to not tell Hutao or Zhongli about this.
We sit in the car park for another 10 minutes and then leave.

We arrive at the hotel at 00:40. We still had many left over monsters and sweets that we left in the car. Xiao practically carried me in cause I was so tired. I almost fell asleep in his arms.
He placed me down on my bed, I shut my eyes.
"Good night Y/n" Xiao whispers, kissing my forehead before getting in next to me. He wrapped his arms around my stomach holding me tight.
"I love you Xiao.." I whispered

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Your welcome for the wholesome content <3
Anyways have a good night/morning/evening
Stay hydrated and safe!
I love you and I'm proud of you <333

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